


You Have My Heart (in your hands)

by rsadelle



Category: Bandom, Cobra Starship
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-26
Updated: 2009-11-26
Packaged: 2017-10-26 20:33:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 36,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/287553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rsadelle/pseuds/rsadelle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Victoria finds out her boyfriend's cheating on her. Then she finds out she's pregnant. Cobras are never alone, and Gabe's there every step of the way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue: February 2011

**Author's Note:**

> When I was trying to come up with an idea of what I wanted to write for [](http://bandomrarepair.livejournal.com/profile)[**bandomrarepair**](http://bandomrarepair.livejournal.com/), [](http://schuyler.livejournal.com/profile)[**schuyler**](http://schuyler.livejournal.com/) said, "Dude, you know what Gabe loves in real life? Babies. Dude loves babies." The next thing I knew, I was emailing her a little bit of this story every day.
> 
> Thanks to [](http://schuyler.livejournal.com/profile)[**schuyler**](http://schuyler.livejournal.com/) for being my cheerleader, providing advice, and loving this story even as she grew to dislike the actual Gabe and Victoria. Thanks to [](http://eleanor-lavish.livejournal.com/profile)[**eleanor_lavish**](http://eleanor-lavish.livejournal.com/) who was another source for things I didn't know. Thanks to [](http://lakeeffectgirl.livejournal.com/profile)[**lakeeffectgirl**](http://lakeeffectgirl.livejournal.com/) for the editing read through. Thanks to B, who, although he doesn't read fic and probably won't see this, paid attention to what I was saying about this on Twitter and cheered me on with how impressed he was by the story's length.
> 
> I learned everything I know about pregnancy, childbirth, New York State custody law, and real estate from the internet; please do not take anything in this story as medical, legal, or real estate advice.
> 
> Title from New Found Glory's "Too Good To Be."
> 
> [Soundtrack](http://rsadelle.livejournal.com/249883.html) \- [Commentary Track](http://rsadelle.livejournal.com/250167.html)

Victoria wanders around the venue in Charleston, just opening doors and checking things out, exploring. The door isn't locked, isn't even really closed all the way, nothing to warn her not to open it.

Behind it is Jack with some girl, maybe a tech, maybe venue staff. Doesn't really matter who the fuck she is because Jack is fucking her.

He sees Victoria over the girl's shoulder, and scrambles away from her, not even undressed all the way, dick hanging out of his pants, and at least he's wearing a fucking condom. "Baby," he says.

"What the fuck?" It's all she can think. "What the actual fuck?"

"Baby, this doesn't mean anything." Jack pushes the girl away, strips off the condom, and yanks his pants back up.

"You said you loved me!" This is the kind of moment when everything narrows down to one thing that's supposed to matter but apparently doesn't.

"Baby, I do." Jack starts across the room toward her. "Vicks, I totally do." She's told him a million times she hates being called "Vicks." "This was nothing."

"Hey!" the girl says. Victoria and Jack both ignore her.

"If you did, you wouldn't do this! Fuck you!" Victoria jerks away before he gets close enough to touch her and scrambles out the door and practically runs down the hallways until she can get outside and back to her bus.

She wants Gabe or Nate, but she gets Ryland, and he'll have to do. She throws herself down on the couch next to him, and he automatically makes room for her under his arm.

"What's up?"

"That fucker." Victoria hates to cry, especially in front of the rest of her band. But this time she might not be able to keep from doing it. "That fucker," she says again, and this time her voice breaks and she's crying, and Ryland hauls her into his lap and just lets her.

"Jack was fucking someone else," she says when she can speak again.

"Fucking asshole," Ryland says promptly.

He must tell the other guys, because they keep her away from ATL for the rest of the day and get her drunk after the show. She only finds out about Jack's black eye and split lip when she sees a picture on Twitter the next day. She doesn't ask which one of them did it.


	2. Prologue: February 2011

Victoria is fucking tired. Like, tour takes its toll on everyone, but this is outrageous. She hasn't even been partying that hard, mostly because she's too tired.

At soundcheck in the Midwest somewhere - Indiana or Nebraska or something (time and place seem to lose all meaning on tour) - and there's some problem with Nate's kit, and Gabe leaves his mic and comes over to her. He rests a hand on her back.

"Babe, you okay?" Since he and Bianca broke up, he's been calling her "babe" the same way he calls Alex "papi" or Nate "snookums" (when he can get away with it without Nate retaliating). Victoria figures he needs some kind of outlet for his affection.

She can't even summon up the energy to smile or shrug or anything. She leans back against his hand for a second. "Just tired."

Gabe narrows his eyes at her. "You can nap after this. We'll do the meet and greet without you."

She nods, and Gabe steps away. "Come on, including you, you've got two drum techs here," he yells to Nate. "Get your shit together!"

Nate flips him off and keeps adjusting his kit.

It's all Victoria can do to stay on her feet and with-it for soundcheck, and they don't listen to her when she says she can make it back to the bus on her own. Alex walks her back and talks to her the whole time, chatter she doesn't have to respond to, except when he reminds her to set an alarm.

She sleeps straight through until it goes off, and when she gets up, there's a note outside her bunk that says, "Sandwich in the fridge." She eats the sandwich, a couple of handfuls of chips, and some carrot sticks that probably belong to Gabe or Alex.

She feels like she's forgetting something, but she actually has all her shit together when she walks - slowly, so if she's getting sick she can use all her energy for the show - back to the venue.

"The triumphant return of our keytarist," Gabe crows when she joins them in the dressing room. He swings his arms around her, but it's gentler than it looks. "How're you feeling?"

"Better." Victoria tips her head up and smiles at him. "Good enough for now."

Gabe squeezes he close for a second and then lets her get ready.

Victoria puts every last bit of her energy into the show, and she comes off stage feeling like she might collapse. She practically falls onto the couch in the dressing room, and she can hear Alex and Nate swearing.

"I think she's just getting sick," Gabe says.

Victoria feels a touch against her arm, and she opens her eyes to see Gabe crouched down in front of her.

"Think you can manage a shower?"

She needs one, whether or not she can. "Yeah." She holds her hands out for Gabe to pull her up, and manages enough of a shower that she doesn't feel completely gross anymore.

Ryland and Alex make room for her on the couch, and she waits while everyone else gets their showers, and then they walk her back to the bus despite her protest that they don't all need to come with her.

"Babe," Gabe says, "I'm too pretty to carry you myself if you fall over," even though she knows he's more than strong enough to pick her up, and Nate could probably carry her to the bus and back all day long.

Victoria's really too tired to argue, so she lets them walk her back, and doesn't kick Nate when he hovers to make sure she gets into her bunk okay.

She wakes up in the middle of the night in a blinding panic and scrambles for her laptop to look back at their itinerary and try to match it to her memory. That nagging feeling she had earlier that she was forgetting something? It turns out it's more like something was forgetting her. Despite the way everything blurs together on tour, she's pretty sure it's been too damn long since she last had her period.

She lets out a soft, "Fuck," and slides back down onto her back, automatically pushing the laptop to the inside of the bunk. It could just be stress. Stress can fuck with your period, right? Sure, she's been on tour for years, but the breakup adds to the stress, right?

"Fuck," she says again.

She doesn't sleep the rest of the night, and after the bus stops, she waits until she can hear Gabe's snoring join everyone else's sleep noises before sneaking out to find a drugstore.

She does the test in the drugstore's bathroom, and has to stifle the urge to throw up or cry when it comes up pregnant. She has her phone with her, so she looks up the closest Planned Parenthood office and then calls a cab.

She has to spend time in the waiting room, where she refuses to read the pamphlets they have lying around. She doesn't need anything to make it more real.

The nurse tells her the same thing the cheap test did, and outlines options Victoria hears only in a daze.

She leaves the clinic with a phone number and a handful of pamphlets she's not sure she'll be able to bring herself to read.

She wanders around until she finds a diner, where she orders a giant stack of pancakes and doesn't think about anything but the next bite.

She smokes what's going to be her last cigarette, and leaves the rest of the pack on a bench. She gets a cab back to the venue.

"Hey, where've you-" Gabe cuts himself off. "Victoria?"

Victoria can't make herself walk toward them, or say anything.

Gabe kicks out at Nate and Ryland, on the floor playing video games. "Turn that off, fuckers."

"Ow," Nate complains. "What the fuck?"

Ryland turns and sees her, and pauses the game. He even goes so far as to turn off the TV.

Victoria's breath is very loud in the sudden silence.

"Alex," Gabe calls, "you too."

Alex turns around from where he's doing something in their kitchen and says, "I'm cooking," and then he looks at Victoria, turns around, and then comes farther into the lounge without the knife he'd been holding.

"Victoria?" Gabe prompts.

Her voice sounds very far away as she says, "I'm pregnant."

Nobody moves or speaks for what seems like an eternity, and then Ryland pulls out Guy Ripley to ask, "Is this a felicitous occasion?"

"I don't know." That doesn't feel any more like her voice either.

Gabe gets up off the couch and comes over to her. "It's going to be okay," he says, and he wraps his arms around her. A moment later, Nate's at her back, and then Alex and Ryland, and she just lets them hold her up in the center of them.

*

Gabe posts to their MySpace blog.

> We're the band that's always ready to party. We know some of you aren't happy with the way we haven't been hanging out as much recently. It's been a tough tour for us, and we're trying to balance out partying with you and taking care of ourselves enough to give you the best fucking show we can.

Half the comments are from people telling them to stay healthy. The other half are people who are bitter they're not hanging out or people speculating about what Jack and Victoria's rumored breakup has to do with it.

*

Victoria reads something, or maybe the nurse told her, that says she's going to be tired for the first trimester. It explains why she keeps napping. Between that and the regular old weirdness of sleep on tour, her sleep schedule is completely fucked.

She's in the back lounge in the middle of the night, watching the lights of passing towns and cars, wide awake and trying not to think. Gabe doesn't turn on the light when he comes in, navigates his way to the couch by the light coming through the windows. He sits down next to her, and she fits herself easily into the space at his side.

She's had her hand on her stomach this whole time without really noticing it.

"It's his." They all have to know, but she hasn't said it out loud yet.

Gabe tightens his arm around her and says, "No. Nothing about this belongs to that motherfucking asshole of a douchebag." His voice is almost too low to be heard, and she's never, ever heard him sound that angry. If she didn't know he was angry for her, she'd be afraid. He gentles and says, "It's yours. Everything about this is yours. Your choice. Your body." He pauses and then says, carefully, "Your kid, if you want it."

"How can I?" Victoria takes her hand off her stomach to wave at their surroundings. This is what she'd been trying not to think about. "How does that fit with this?"

Gabe's silent for a moment, and then he says, "We'd make it fit. You can teach me or one of the techs to play well enough to cover soundcheck so you can rest if you need to. Between this tour and the next one, you'll only be at seven months, and we can take a break after that."

It's what Victoria wants. She's known, really, since the day she took the test. The day she smoked her last cigarette.

"I want to be this kid's mom," she tells Gabe. "Fuck, what if he wants custody?"

Gabe's answer comes swift and sure. "He can't have it. We'll get you a lawyer, a fucking good one, and make sure he doesn't get it."

She nods and closes her eyes. "Okay, fuck, okay."

She doesn't mind when Gabe's hand covers hers, big enough to cover it completely and spread over the edges onto her stomach. She keeps her eyes closed, and apparently it was the worry keeping her awake because she can feel herself slipping toward sleep.

"Babe," Gabe says, "go to bed." He pushes her up and she stumbles back into her bunk.

In the morning, she sees what he tweeted just after she went to bed: _Life is a fucking amazing miracle._

*

They have a band meeting between soundcheck and the show. Alex makes half a dozen things for them to snack on and Gabe locks the door to the bus.

When they're all settled around the table, Gabe bangs his fist on the table. "Cobras, come to order."

Ryland promptly says, "Steak, rare, with the baked potato."

Gabe flips him off. "Any other wiseasses?" He waits for a moment, and then shakes his head. "I don't know if I should be glad you're taking this seriously or disappointed only one of you could come up with an appropriate joke." He doesn't wait for anyone to come up with another one before he says, "Victoria?"

She's sitting next to Gabe, and she reaches for his hand. He hums a few bars of "Papa Don't Preach," and Victoria stifles a burst of giggles.

"I'm keeping it." She's a lot less ambivalent about it now, and a smile takes over her face. "You're all going to be uncles."

Nate lets out a whoop. Alex grins and pushes one of the snack trays at her.

Ryland says, "Delicious," but his smile is too open to be Guy Ripley.

It's almost too much, and Victoria grips Gabe's hand to have some kind of outlet for it. He squeezes back and lets everyone spend another couple of minutes making excited exclamations. Victoria swallows the lump in her throat and tries not to let it make her cry.

"All right, assholes," Gabe finally says, grinning the whole time, "we've got shit to discuss."

"Don't tell anyone yet," Victoria says as soon as they calm down. "I haven't even told my parents."

Alex is looking at Gabe when he asks, "When are you going to do that?"

"Tomorrow." They have a day off, so she can spend as much time as she needs to on the phone with them. "And then I'll write a blog entry, and then you can tell people." Gabe usually handles this kind of publicity, but he already said everything about this is hers, and that's going to include how they tell people.

"Next topic," Gabe says. "The bus and the area outside the door are now non-smoking zones."

"We've already been doing that," Ryland points out.

"Mostly. Now one hundred percent." Gabe flashes a grin. "Baby Cobra's going to be as healthy as we can make it." He points at Victoria. "That means regular meals for you and no more weird diets."

Victoria makes a face and lets go of his hand. "I can take care of myself." She picks up a piece of bruschetta and cups her other hand under it as she takes a bite.

"Of course you can," Gabe says, not at all like he means it.

Victoria wonders how fast their hovering is going to get old.

"So a break after the next tour," Ryland says.

"Yeah, at least until Victoria and the baby are ready to tour again."

"Oh, fuck," Nate says, "touring with a baby."

"Can't be any worse than having your ass with us," Victoria shoots back.

"Children," Ryland admonishes. It only makes Nate and Victoria stick their tongues out at each other.

Gabe laughs. "Bottom line," he says, "Victoria sets our pace. Whatever you need, babe."

Victoria reaches across the table. "What I need right now is some of the tapenade."

Ryland slides it toward her with a sigh. "I can see how this pregnancy is going to go."

Victoria smirks at him. "You're going to be waiting on me hand and foot, boys, hand and foot."

*

Victoria commandeers the back lounge in the morning and calls her parents. She tells them a couple of tour stories and hears about the latest antics of one of Mom's friends before she says, "I called because I need to tell you something."

"What is it, honey?" Mom asks.

Victoria knows her parents love her, but she's still scared, so she says it fast, like ripping off a Band-Aid. "I'm pregnant."

"Well," Dad says.

Mom says, "Oh."

"This is a good thing," Victoria tells them. "I'm happy about it." And even though she _is_ , she's still telling her parents that she's pregnant, so her voice wavers and she has to wipe her eyes.

"What about the father?" Dad asks. If she knows her parents at all, they pointed at each other until he gave in and asked it.

"Not around." They can do the math and figure out it was Jack; she'd rather not say it out loud any more than she has to.

"Oh, honey," Mom sighs.

"It's not like I'm going to be alone." If she turns her head, Victoria can look out the window and see Gabe and Nate playing some kind of improvised game with a basketball and a Frisbee for the benefit of an audience of crew members. "I have the rest of the band."

"A band is no substitute for a husband," Mom says tartly. It's a conversation they've had before. Sometimes Victoria doesn't understand how her mom's carried this odd streak of conservatism through a life around musicians.

"Can't you just be happy for me?" In a minute, she's going to be crying and whining like a teenager, which won't help her case. "Can't you be happy you're going to be grandparents?"

"Of course we're happy about the baby," Dad says, "even if this isn't the ideal situation."

"When are you due?" Mom asks.

"November. It'll be good - we're on tour until September and we were talking about taking a break for the holidays anyway."

"Victoria," Mom scolds, "you can't tour while pregnant."

"Mom," Victoria sighs, "I'll be fine. The guys already agreed to help out."

"Sweetheart, you know you can call us if you need anything," Dad says, probably because he doesn't want to hear another round of "your band is not a husband" any more than Victoria does.

"Thanks Dad." Outside, the game Nate and Gabe are playing now includes a tambourine, a rubber chicken, and people divided up into what are either dance teams or designated cheering sections. "I will."

"We love you, honey," Mom says. "We just want what's best for you."

Victoria smiles at that; if there's one thing she's never doubted, it's that. It's something she'll have to make sure she does for her kid too.

"I love you too." She promises to take care of herself and their grandchild and call again soon.

She watches Gabe and Nate run around for a couple of minutes - that's definitely a cheer routine they have the crew doing - and then leaves her phone in the back lounge and goes out to the front.

"Weezer sing along," she announces. Alex groans, but Ryland starts singing and she joins in. Ten minutes later, Alex gives in and leaves the bus. Victoria and Ryland sing another couple of songs before she has to stop and get up for a bottle of water. She comes back and leans over to hug Ryland tight.

"Okay?" he asks.

Victoria smiles at him, and it doesn't even feel forced. "Yeah, thanks."

She goes back into the back lounge and picks up her phone again.

Her next call is to Amber, who puts her on speaker so Gizmo can hear her. She does the same routine of exchanging tour stories for Gizmo stories before she says, "I'm pregnant."

There's a moment of silence before Amber shrieks. "Gizmo, baby, did you hear that? You're going to have a little brother or sister!"

Victoria grins so hard she thinks it might split her face.

"I can't wait to buy your kid the cutest clothes," Amber gushes. "I hope it's a girl so we can put her in dresses like yours."

Victoria outright laughs. "Between you and the band, my kid's going to be the most fashionable kid on the block."

She makes Amber promise not to tell anyone until after her blog entry goes up, and then she calls Ashlee.

Ashlee answers with, "Hey, sweetie, what's up?"

"You can't tell anyone," Victoria says, "not even Pete."

"Oooh, secrets!"

Victoria grins. "Just for another couple of days, until I make the real announcement."

"Tell me, tell me!" Victoria's pretty sure that if Ashlee didn't need to hold her phone she'd be clapping her hands together. She might actually be jumping up and down.

"I'm pregnant."

Ashlee yelps. "That's great! And I can't tell anyone?"

"Just for a day or two," Victoria promises. "Until I post the official announcement."

Outside, Alex is now somehow involved in Nate and Gabe's game and they've added a handful of limes.

"I'm scared," Victoria admits.

"Sweetie," Ashlee says softly, "so was I. But being pregnant was the most amazing thing. And now we have Bronx."

Victoria tucks her feet up under herself. "Do you think I'm crazy for staying on tour the whole time?"

"I don't know," Ashlee says. "If you take care of yourself and you can handle it. Make the boys carry your bags."

Victoria giggles. "Gabe already said we're doing whatever I need."

Ashlee giggles too. "You have him so wrapped around your little finger."

Victoria keeps giggling. "All of them. Alex keeps cooking, and they won't let me go anywhere by myself."

"Oh," Ashlee says as if she's just thought of something. "Is that where Jack got the black eye?"

Victoria stops laughing. It hasn't been long enough not to hurt. "Probably. I didn't ask."

"Shit," Ashlee mutters. "This is a totally happy thing, and then I brought that up."

"My mom gave me shit about it." Victoria turns so she can watch the boys playing outside. Gabe's pointing at Nate, who's flapping his arms like chicken wings.

"Fuck that! Asshole cheated on you." Ashlee's silent for a moment and then she asks, "It is his, right?"

Victoria pulls her knees up to her chest and rests her forehead on them so it's like she's alone in the world. "Yeah. I told Gabe and he said it's all mine."

Ashlee laughs like she can't help it. "Please. You know Gabe's going to spoil that kid to death. You've seen him with Bronx."

Victoria manages a wobbly smile. "Yeah. He's already calling it Baby Cobra."

"Thank God Pete never got it into his head to make Bronx FOB's mascot. You know your kid's going to be wearing bright colors and cobra jewelry from the day it's born, right?"

Victoria laughs. "It's not any worse than your kid and his Clan merch."

Ashlee laughs too, and then she says, softly, "It's gonna be great. And you can always, always call me if you need advice about being pregnant and famous. And now it's time for me to go be mommy." Ashlee sends a loud kiss down the line. "Call me when you need to."

"I will. Thanks."

"Sweetie, we've gotta stick together." And with that Ashlee hangs up.

Victoria looks out the window and watches Alex do what is probably a victory lap before being handed the rubber chicken. She has no idea what the rules of the game are, but everyone seems to be having fun.

"That's what things are gonna be like," she says out loud, and then feels silly for talking to a baby who probably can't even hear her yet.

She grabs her laptop from her bunk and settles down again. It takes her a while to figure out what she wants to say, and even though it's not very long, she's still not sure about it.

She doesn't end up posting it until the next day.

>  **The Truth**  
>  We've gotten a lot of questions about why we haven't been hanging out as much on this tour. Gabe's been answering them, but those of you who thought he wasn't telling the truth were right. Here's the truth: I'm pregnant, and the rest of my band is overprotective. That's it. That's the whole truth. I'm just about through my first trimester. It's supposed to not be so tiring after that. I hope that's true too. I miss you all and I want to hang out again!

She tweets the link and then closes her laptop and doesn't look again until after soundcheck.

The rest of her band, Guy Ripley, Pete, and Ashlee all retweeted it, and she has a shitload of comments and replies.

Most of them are congratulations, but there are a fair number speculating about the father and a few calling her a slut or a sinner. She gets a string of about four of those in a row, and she's starting to tear up when Gabe closes her laptop.

"Babe, don't torture yourself."

"I'm fine," she says, even though she's not. "It's just the pregnancy stuff." Even though it's not.

Gabe takes the laptop off of her lap and puts it down on the other side of the lounge. "They're going to talk shit. Don't listen to them."

Victoria nods and doesn't pick up her laptop for the rest of the day.

That night, just before they go on, Gabe switches up the set list and replaces "Send My Love to the Dance Floor" with "Church of Hot Addiction." He comes over to Victoria and passes his hand over her head with "get the Cobra bless now."

*

Over the course of the tour, they collect copies of pretty much every pregnancy and child rearing book in existence, three boxes of stuffed animals, and half a dozen bags of baby clothes.

At one meet and greet that Victoria feels well enough to go to, a woman clutching a bag hangs back so she's at the end of the line. She introduces herself as Teri.

"You're so brave for doing this," she says. She's maybe a couple of years older than Victoria. "I wasn't that brave." Victoria can see her fight back tears before she says, "I made you something." She pulls it out of the bag and holds it up so Victoria can see it before she hands it over.

It's not the first baby blanket she's gotten, but it's by far the best. When Victoria reaches out for it, she finds it's made out of the softest yarn she's ever touched. It has cheerful pale green cobras against a lavender background, and delicate letters spelling out "Cobra For Life" all around the edges.

Victoria stands up and steps forward to hug Teri, the blanket between them. She finds she can't let go.

"Thank you," Victoria whispers. When they step apart, they both have tears in their eyes.

Gabe's hand rests low on Victoria's back as he steps forward. "It's amazing. Come get a picture." All five of them array themselves around Teri. She and Victoria hold the blanket between them. Gabe keeps his hand on Victoria's back and makes sure they get a picture with their camera as well as Teri's.


	3. Second Trimester: May 2011

They get two weeks off between tours, and Victoria's mostly just glad to see Gizmo, sleep in her own bed, and have the entirety of her wardrobe to choose from. She's also grateful for the way it means she isn't in close proximity to Jack anymore. He stayed away from her, even after she made the announcement, but she kept expecting to see him around every corner.

On the second day, she's lounging around in pajamas, cuddling with Gizmo and watching _CSI: Miami_ , when Gabe shows up.

Victoria keeps Gizmo from escaping out the door as she asks, "What are you doing here?"

Gabe holds up a bag. "I brought you breakfast."

Victoria takes the bag from him and heads for the kitchen, letting him follow or not. "I can actually feed myself, you know."

"I know." Gabe has Gizmo cuddled up against his chest when he joins her in the kitchen. "Maybe I just missed you." He grins at her. It's very charming.

"It's been two days." The bag is full of bagels and three kinds of cream cheese. Victoria gets out plates and knives. "That's not long enough to miss me."

Gabe puts Gizmo down so he can slice a bagel for himself. "I was totally lonely," he insists.

Somehow Gabe always knows the best places for food, and the bagels are absolutely perfect.

Gabe glances over way too casually just as Victoria has a mouth full of sesame seed bagel with herb cream cheese. "Don't you have a doctor's appointment today?"

"Not until two." Gizmo's way too excited about people eating, so she gets a treat for him from the jar on the counter. It's why she's not paying attention when Gabe asks, "You want some company?"

Victoria says, "Yes," without thinking about it. And then she stops and thinks about it. She does want company, but she can do this alone. It's a lot easier than that first visit to Planned Parenthood. "You don't have to come with me."

"I don't mind." Gabe puts his bagel down. "We're going to be around for everything else, we might as well be there for this."

Victoria crosses her arms over her chest. "We? Did you all vote on you coming along with me or are you acting alone?"

"Think of it as a royal plural." Gabe bends down and picks up Gizmo. "You're not going to have to do anything alone." He looks at Gizmo and not her as he says it.

Even though he said they would do what she needed and she told her parents she wasn't going to be alone, hearing him say straight out that she's not going to be alone is a relief.

"Okay." She points at his bagel. "What're you having?"

"Strawberry on cinnamon raisin." He picks it up, and holds it out to her, keeping it away from Gizmo. "No arguments?"

Victoria takes a bite of his bagel. It's a little sweet for her tastes. "No." She shrugs. "I did tell my mom I wasn't going to do this alone."

Gabe puts his bagel back on the plate and Gizmo on the floor. "You gonna let me hang out on your couch until it's time to go?"

Victoria scoops up her plate. "Yeah."

She cares more about her bagel than what they watch, so she cedes the remote to Gabe. He flips through the channels and stops on _The Karate Kid_ while she keeps Gizmo off the couch until they're done eating.

*

They take the subway to her appointment, and they're both in casual clothes and glasses instead of contacts, so no one recognizes them. No one even looks twice at them in the waiting room. Gabe reads her advice from parenting magazines and she drinks down a bottle of water while they wait for the nurse to call her name.

The nurse weighs her, takes her blood pressure, asks questions about medications and her last period. She'd be embarrassed, but it's not like Gabe doesn't know anyway. Fuck, they were living on a bus together at the time.

"Doctor Sanders will be right with you," the nurse says after she's asked all of the questions, and then she leaves them alone in the room.

Gabe leans back in his chair and looks at the diagrams on the wall. "Never been in a gynecologist's office before."

"OB/GYN," Victoria corrects absently.

"Never been in an OB/GYN's office before."

Victoria digs through the basket of magazines between the chairs until she finds something whose cover promises fun summer activities to do with kids. "Here." She shoves it at Gabe, and lets him amuse himself suggesting ways they could change up said activities for use on tour.

Doctor Sanders comes back with Victoria's chart in her hand and the nurse following along behind her. Victoria's been seeing Doctor Sanders for years and genuinely likes her.

"Victoria." Doctor Sanders sits down on the rolling stool. "How are you?"

"Good." Victoria gestures at Gabe. "This is Gabe."

Doctor Sanders reaches across to shake his hand.

"Not the father," Victoria clarifies.

Doctor Sanders nods and glances down at her file. "Okay. So do you know about how far along you are?"

"At least three months." Victoria doesn't look at Gabe while she says it.

Doctor Sanders tsks. "You should've been in here before this."

"We were on tour." Victoria resists the urge to reach out for Gabe's hand. "We're leaving again in a week and a half, for four months."

Doctor Sanders tsks again. "So much for celebrity clients being all about the glamour." She makes a note on the chart. "That's going to be tough."

"But I can do it?" This time, she does reach for Gabe. He takes her hand and squeezes it.

"We're going to do an ultrasound," Doctor Sanders tells her. "It'll let me know how far along you are, and if we don't see any problems, you take care of yourself, and we schedule you some appointments while you're on the road, then you should be okay."

She has Victoria settle onto a table and pull up her shirt. Her skirt is low enough that she doesn't have to do anything but tug it down a little bit. Gabe comes over with her and doesn't let go of her hand.

"This is gonna be a little cold and goopy," Doctor Sanders warns, and she and the nurse work together to move things around for a moment before she squeezes something cold and goopy onto Victoria's stomach. Victoria tries not to jump, and Gabe takes a step closer to her.

Doctor Sanders points at the screen. "There it is."

She can see the shape of the baby. Her baby. It makes it almost even more real than the way her belly's just starting to curve with it.

Gabe's free hand strokes over her hair. "Look at that." He sounds completely and totally awed.

"Yeah." Victoria can't look away from the screen.

Doctor Sanders moves the thing on her stomach for a couple of minutes. "You're about thirteen weeks," she finally says, "which makes your due date around November 21, although don't count on it being that day specifically. Everything looks good."

"Can we get a copy of the picture?" Gabe asks.

"Of course," Doctor Sanders says. She moves the thing on Victoria's stomach again, and then stops and does something that presumably has something to do with getting them a picture.

"Can I find out if it's a boy or a girl?" Victoria asks.

"Too early," Doctor Sanders says. "We might be able to tell by the time we do another ultrasound."

The nurse helps her get the goopy stuff off her skin - although she's still going to want a shower when she gets home - and shows her to the restroom. They made her drink a lot of water for the ultrasound. Victoria comes back and sits in one of the chairs by Doctor Sanders' desk.

"Are you going to be back here during your tour?" Doctor Sanders asks.

Victoria shakes her head. "Only once."

"If you can get us a schedule of where you'll be, we'll see about making referrals for you to local places."

Gabe already has his phone out. "I've got it." Doctor Sanders gives him an email address to send it to, and promises to make a list of referrals for them.

She also gives Victoria a sample of prenatal vitamins with strict instructions to pick up her own and take them every day, and the short version of the restrictions lecture Victoria already knows: no alcohol, no cigarettes, no drugs, no raw fish, no hot tubs, and only limited caffeine.

Gabe puts his arm around Victoria. "We're making sure she takes care of herself."

Doctor Sanders says, "Very charming," but smiles while she does, and then hands cards with the office's phone number to both of them. "Call us if you have any questions. We'd rather you bother us than not call and have something happen to you and the baby." She hands over the ultrasound photo too, shakes their hands, and the nurse walks them out.

Gabe insists on taking her to lunch. He finds a diner and they sit there for hours talking about music and telling childhood stories. He takes the subway back with her, too, and walks her all the way to her door where Gizmo jumps on both of them.

"Think you can tear yourself away from us?" Victoria asks after Gizmo calms himself down a little.

Gabe pulls out his phone and looks down at the screen. "I have to. Dinner with my pops." He wraps Victoria and Gizmo up in a hug. "Thanks for letting me spend the day with you."

Victoria hugs him back. "It was fun. We should do it again sometime."

Gabe grins down at her. "We will." He scratches behind Gizmo's ears. "I want a copy of Baby Cobra's first photo."

"I'll send you one."

After Gabe leaves, Victoria takes the ultrasound picture out of her bag and stares at it for a long time. After a while, she puts it on the scanner and emails it to Gabe, the rest of the guys, her parents, Amber, and Ashlee.

Then she takes it off the scanner and puts it in one of the magnetic frames on the fridge.

*

When she told Gabe they should do it again sometime, she didn't really mean the next day, but that's when he shows up.

"Watching TV again? That'll rot your brain."

"We're on a break." Victoria lets Gizmo rush at Gabe. "What else should I be doing?"

Gabe points at the boxes of books she hasn't unpacked. "You could read up on pregnancy and parenting while you have the time."

Victoria stares at him. He's really suggesting she work her way through two and a half boxes of books?

"If I'm doing it, you can too."

Victoria keeps staring at him. "What?"

Gabe kneels down and opens one of the boxes. "What do you think happened to the duplicates?" He starts pulling books out and unpacking them into stacks on the floor.

Victoria sits down next to him. "You mean I have two and a half boxes of baby books and none of them are duplicates?"

"I took the duplicates, and we gave away anything more than that." Gabe hands her a stack of books. "These are pretty good." He points at one of the other stacks. "Those suck." He waves at the rest of them. "I haven't read any of these yet."

Victoria takes the stack of Gabe-approved books to the couch and turns off the TV. "When did you even have time to read all of these?"

"Not all of us spent most of the tour in bed." Gabe smiles, so she knows it's not meant meanly. "And it didn't take long to realize the ones that suck sucked."

Victoria skims the titles and picks the one that sounds the most interesting to start with. She's a couple of chapters in - she doesn't really need to read the things about the first trimester in detail; she already lived it - when Gabe finishes with sorting the rest of the books. He's moved the stacks into boxes and labeled them with his ever-present Sharpie: "good shit - Victoria read," "sucks - burn," and "? - Gabe read." He brings over a bunch of books from the last box and sits down at the other end of the couch.

They read in companionable silence until Victoria's stomach growls loud enough to make Gabe look up from his book.

"Do you have anything to eat here or you wanna go out?"

Victoria does not want to go out. In an ideal world, she wouldn't even have to leave the couch. "I don't think there's anything worth eating. We could order something."

Gabe looks at her for a long moment, and then says, "You need to start eating better. He glances down at his book and then closes it and puts it down on top of his stack. "I'll go down to the corner and pick some things up."

"I'm not cooking."

"Hey," Gabe says, "I'm no Suarez, but I think I can handle lunch for two."

Victoria waves toward the door. "My keys are on the table."

By the time Gabe comes back, Victoria's swapped out one of the pregnancy books for one of the child rearing ones.

"The bodega on your corner doesn't carry shit." Despite the complaint, Gabe's carrying a pair of plastic bags. He takes them through into the kitchen.

"Yell if you can't find anything," Victoria says. Gabe seems to do okay on his own, because half an hour later he rearranges everything on the coffee table so he can set out pasta, salad, and plates.

"I can't believe you made this from stuff you got at a bodega that's not up to your standards," she says when she tastes the pasta.

"Hey, I'm a modern man. I cooked just as much as Bianca did."

Victoria stretches one leg out across the couch and nudges at his thigh. "You okay?" It's the first time she's heard him mention Bianca in a while. For as outgoing as Gabe usually is, he can also be fiercely private.

Gabe shrugs. "Getting there. It'll be better once we can sell the apartment." He rests his hand on her ankle. "How about you?"

She has to think about it, because she's been trying not to think about Jack or anything related to him. Except the baby, of course. The sting of betrayal is still sharp and she misses having someone be there for her, but she doesn't miss Jack himself as much anymore.

"Yeah, I guess," she says. "I still don't understand why he did it."

"Because he's a fucking asshole." Gabe strokes his thumb over her skin. "You know that, right, babe? That it wasn't because of you?"

"I chose him," Victoria points out. "My shitty choice got me here."

"You couldn't know he was gonna do that."

Victoria shakes her head. "We were hooking up for a long time before we were dating. Probably not the best way to start something." She digs back into her pasta.

Gabe watches her eat for a while, and just about the time she thinks that's going to be it, he says, "That's how I met Bianca, you know."

Victoria's heard the story of their first date, but she didn't know that. "You still broke up."

"It was really good for a long time. And neither one of us cheated."

Victoria finishes her pasta and puts the plate down on the coffee table. "I won't be hooking up with anyone any time soon anyway." She puts her hand over her stomach. It's something she does now, without even thinking about it.

Gabe puts his plate down too, and scoots across the couch to put his arm around her. "In a couple of months, you're going to have a kid, and someday you're going to meet a guy who'll want to be a part of that."

Victoria leans her head against his shoulder. "I'm starting to think touring means never having that."

"It's working for Ryland and Alex." Gabe kisses the top of her head. "When it's time, it'll happen."

*

The next day, Gabe makes her leave the house for an epic trip to Whole Foods, and then sticks around to teach her how to make empanadas and read to her from one of the funnier parenting books.

The day after that, they spend much of the day reading again.

The day after that, they go shopping for tour-appropriate maternity clothes, an expedition that leaves Victoria exhausted beyond belief. Gabe keeps an arm around her on the walk from the cab up to her apartment.

After Victoria unlocks the door, Gabe pushes Gizmo away with a firm, "No," and walks her past the couch to her room.

"I thought I was over this." Victoria steps out of her shoes and climbs into bed.

"You had a lot of clothes to try on. You want Gizmo in here with you?"

Victoria holds out her hand to gesture Gizmo up onto the bed with her. He cuddles under her chin, and her eyes close without her having to think about it.

She wakes up later remembering why she doesn't sleep in her bra. She's barely out of bed before she's stripping off her dress to get out of it. Gizmo whines at her while she's pulling on the shorty pajamas Ashlee sent as part of her congratulations you're pregnant but that doesn't mean you can't look sexy present.

"I know, baby. Let's get you something to eat."

She opens the door and follows Gizmo toward the kitchen. Gabe's still there, stretched out on her couch with a book in his hands and a coffee cup next to him. When he looks up, his eyes flicker over her outfit, almost as if he's checking her out.

Victoria keeps walking past him. "You're still here."

"Sure am. Dinner's on the stove, should be ready in about half an hour. Could you stir it while you're in there?"

Victoria measures out food for Gizmo and puts it on the floor for him, then stirs the soup Gabe has cooking. "What is this?"

"Lentils. There's stuff for a salad, too. And bread, unless you ate it all when I wasn't here."

"I think there's some left." Victoria opens the cabinet she's pretty sure she put the bread into. There's enough for them to each have a slice or two with their soup. "Yeah." She comes back into the living room, and Gabe makes room for her on the couch and passes her the book she's been reading.

Victoria takes it and opens to where she left off, but looks over at Gabe instead of down at the book. "So are you just hanging out here the rest of the break?"

Gabe says, "Until you kick me out," without missing a beat, but Victoria knows him well enough to see the hint of uncertainty behind it.

"And miss out on all the home-cooked food? No way." Victoria picks up her book. "Besides, you're not done with your box of books to read yet. I'm doing all the work of carrying this kid; I'm not going to read crappy books on top of it."

*

Sure enough, Gabe spends most of their break hanging out at Victoria's, with the exception of occasional press obligations. Management does a good job of keeping them all up to date on interview dates and the resulting press clippings. Victoria rarely does interviews and only sometimes checks them out later, but Gabe does almost every one and watches or reads all of them. Victoria starts keeping track of the schedule, though, so she knows when Gabe will be around.

He brings over takeout one evening after a day full of interviews, and Victoria finally asks, "Are they asking about me?"

Gabe takes a moment to swallow his mouthful of lo mein before he answers her. "You're pregnant, and we're taking you back out on tour. Of course they're asking. We're telling them how happy we are about the baby, and then moving on."

Victoria eats an egg roll and thinks about what she actually wants to know. "How's the press taking it?"

"They're curious, but no one's hanging around outside your building. Fan reaction's mostly the same." Gabe pauses for a moment and then says, "Lot of people asking why you're not doing interviews."

Victoria groans. "I hate doing interviews. I always sound stupid."

"I know," Gabe says, perfectly calm. "You don't have to do anything before the whole band stuff on tour if you don't want."

It's reassuring, but it still bothers her. Late that night, she tweets, _I don't like the way I sound in interviews which is why I haven't been doing them. Still excited to be a mom! And a little scared..._ Then she thinks about it and sends another one: _My mom's great. I only hope I can live up to that for my kid._

*

When they pack up for tour, Gabe makes sure both boxes of books they're reading through make it onto the bus as part of his space allotment, since Victoria's wardrobe takes up about twice as much space as usual with clothes various saleswomen helped her estimate will fit her in a couple of months.

Her band continues to be overprotective. Victoria's hardly ever alone, and they rarely let security take her places without one of them. She sometimes wishes for a moment to herself, but she's grateful for it when it means she's not the only one fielding questions when they run into fans.

She reads, in books and on blogs, about total strangers touching pregnant women's stomachs. With one or more of her band members always flanking her, it never happens to Victoria.

At a meet and greet in Virginia, a woman in the line sneers down at Victoria. "You shameless hussy, displaying your sin to the world."

Victoria's too shocked to do anything other than gape at her. They're spread out across the room, so no one else is close enough to hear what the woman is saying. They must notice Victoria, though, or the momentary silence and subsequent whispers from the fans closest to her, because before she can think what to do, Nate crowds himself into the space between them, Alex snaps for security, Ryland takes Victoria's arm to walk her out of the room, and Gabe appears on her other side looking grim and furious.

"Where the fuck was security?" he demands.

Danny doesn't look any happier about it than anyone else. "Circulating through the room. It's the way we usually handle that kind of setup."

Ryland leads Victoria over to a chair and stands next to her. By now, Nate and Alex have also made it out of the meet and greet.

"And clearly that's working well," Alex says.

"Someone needs to be with Victoria," Nate puts in.

Gabe paces the room. "They can't fucking talk to her like that." He looks murderous.

And that's enough for Victoria. "Gabe," she says, "I'm okay." She's not sure it's true, but she wants him to calm down.

Gabe turns to look at her, and there's something she can't read hiding beneath his anger. "They can't talk-"

"They're going to talk shit," she says over him. "Don't listen to them."

Gabe's mouth tightens, and then he slams out of the room. Danny's on his radio before the door's even closed, telling security to follow him. Gabe doesn't have this kind of temper tantrum very often, but they all know to just let him go until he calms down when he does.

Ryland half leans, half crouches to hug Victoria. "You really okay?" Tears prick her eyes, and she shrugs and then shakes her head.

"Take Victoria back to the bus," Alex says. "Nate and I can finish up here."

Ryland, Danny, and a couple of guys from security walk her back, and Ryland lets her curl up against his side on the couch.

Gabe comes back much calmer an hour later and crouches down in front of Victoria. "Babe, you okay?"

She reaches out a hand, and he takes it. "I'm fine." This time she means it without reservation. "That's probably the worst thing anyone's going to say to my face, and I got to cuddle with Ryland all afternoon."

"Guy Ripley's going to be so jealous," Ryland says.

Gabe brings Victoria's hand up to his lips and brushes a kiss across the back of it. "I'm already jealous."

Victoria smiles because he does.

By the time they get off stage, the story has hit Perez, Oh No They Didn't, and TMZ. Victoria has a slew of texts and voice mails about it. She tweets, _People talk shit. Cobras are tough enough to take it._

Gabe reads it over her shoulder and asks, "Is that our official statement?"

Victoria tips her head back to look at him. "It's all I have to say about it."

Gabe drapes an arm around her and tugs her back against him. "Okay." He drops a kiss onto the top of her head. "Whatever you want."

*

Gabe gets falling down drunk in South Carolina. It's not that Victoria's never seen him like that - there were whole tours where he got fucked up every night he could - but not on this tour. He throws up twice and then starts crying.

"Dude," Nate says with wide eyes.

Even Ryland looks worried.

Victoria figures it's her job as the only sober person and the only girl to do something about it. She sits down next to Gabe and puts an arm around him, and he tips down so his head is resting on her breasts like they're a pillow.

Victoria strokes his hair and says soothing, meaningless things like, "Shh," and, "It's okay."

Gabe stops crying eventually, but it takes a long time, and then he's so quiet she thinks he's probably asleep.

"Signed the papers to sell the apartment," he says.

Victoria's been stroking his hair the whole time, but now she stops, and then starts again when she realizes she's stopped. The apartment. That would explain it. The last thing tying him to Bianca. She wonders if he'd been hoping it would be enough for them to get back together, and ignores the way the thought hurts more than it should.

"It's okay," she says instead, and she kisses the top of his head.

Gabe really does fall asleep after that, deeply enough that he doesn't make a sound when Victoria slides out from under him. She gently lowers his head down onto the couch and then picks up his feet and puts them on the couch too so he'll be more comfortable. She gets the blanket from his bed and drapes it over him so he won't be cold. She figures it's good practice for when she has a kid to take care of.

The next day, Victoria's the only person on the whole bus not hungover, so things are quiet. Gabe sleeps all through the morning and into the afternoon.

When he finally gets up, he wraps his arms around Victoria and holds on for a really long time.

*

Gabe reads that hearing is the first sense to develop, so he encourages everyone around to talk to the baby.

Victoria narrates pretty much everything she's doing, just so the baby will know her voice. Alex recites recipes and patter that could fit on any cooking show. Nate's partial to recounting 80s movie plots. Ryland busts out dramatic monologues in a variety of accents.

Gabe puts out a call for people to stop bringing them pregnancy and parenting books and start bringing them children's books in English or Spanish. "This kid's going to be the smartest kid ever," he puts in the MySpace blog when he asks. He finds a book database website where he makes their children's book collection public and keeps it up to date so people won't bring them things they already have.

Instead of getting drunk every night, he sits next to Victoria with a stack of books, and they take turns reading to the baby. Gabe's always disappointed when she makes them stop so she can sleep.

They all sing to the baby, lullabies and rock anthems, their own songs and things they make up on the spot, child-appropriate rounds and the filthiest hip hop they know.

*

Victoria's been able to feel the baby move since just after they left for tour. It started out as a fluttery feeling she wasn't even sure was real, and gradually became stronger.

In the dressing room in New Mexico, Victoria has one hand on her stomach and the other fluffing her hair when the baby kicks hard enough that she can feel it against her hand.

"Oh," she says. Gabe's next to her, so she grabs his hand and puts it on her stomach. "You can feel the baby kicking now."

Gabe turns away from the mirror, toward her, and puts his other hand on her stomach too. There's a look on his face that Victoria almost wants to call reverent.

"God," he murmurs, and then he smiles at her, open and happy and uncomplicated. "Hey, guys, come feel this!"

Victoria laughs and waves the rest of her band over. Gabe's only willing to move one of his hands to make room for them, and Victoria has to physically pry that one away when it's time to go on stage.

"The baby likes shows," she tells him. "It'll still be kicking afterwards."

*

They spend three days in L.A., doing a show and press and taking a day off. Victoria stays with her parents. Nate stays at his place - "My own bed," he both rhapsodizes and gloats - and Gabe, Ryland, and Alex stay with Pete and Ashlee.

"I wish you weren't doing this alone," Mom says for the millionth time.

"I'm not," Victoria says, also for the millionth time.

Since they don't have a lot of time together, they let the argument go for the rest of her visit, although Victoria knows she's going to hear it again later.

*

They go on Ellen in the morning, and the five of them squish onto the couch together. It's a tight fit, and they put Victoria in the middle.

"So you're pregnant," Ellen says not very far into the interview.

"Yes," Victoria answers.

"That must make touring hard."

Victoria smiles. "I was really tired at first, but now I have more energy, and I'm used to it."

"And we all want the best for Victoria and the baby," Gabe says, "so we're keeping to her pace."

"So how excited are you about becoming a mom?"

Victoria can feel her smile stretching wider. "Totally excited."

Ellen grins at all of them. "You all look pretty excited. Who's the most excited?"

All four of them say, "Gabe," at once.

Gabe grins his happy little boy grin and says, "What can I say? I love kids."

"Because you practically are one," Alex says, and then they draw the focus away from Victoria again.

*

They head over to Pete and Ashlee's for lunch afterwards, and Victoria doesn't even suspect anything when they pull up and their driveway is full of cars; Pete and Ashlee will take any excuse to have people over.

Gabe rings the doorbell obnoxiously, and then opens it without waiting for anyone to answer it. "We're here," he calls out, and they all follow him into the house.

As soon as they round the corner into the living room, a chorus of voices calls out, "Surprise!" There's a banner strung over the sliding glass doors that says, "BABY SHOWER" with the figure of a baby between the words, and pastel streamers draped everywhere else.

Victoria gapes at the people filling the room - her parents, their crew, Panic and The Young Veins, a few other people she knows - and then turns and hits a smirking Gabe. "I can't believe you did this."

"Hey, I get some of that credit," Ashlee says. She wraps Victoria up in a giant hug. "And it's my house." She holds out a hand to Pete, who hands over a plastic tiara Ashlee carefully places on Victoria's head.

Victoria works her way around the room, getting hugs and congratulations and catching up with people, until Ashlee tugs her away to get a plate of food.

She's barely finished eating when Ashlee claps her hands and says, "Shower games!"

Spencer gets the closest to guessing how big around Victoria is now. Brendon guesses the most baby food flavors correctly, and names the most number of songs with the word "baby" in the title. Ryan makes a list of baby names Victoria doesn't tell him there is no way in hell she's going to use.

There are presents too, everything from a mobile that's the same kind Pete and Ashlee say Bronx loved when he was a baby to a collection of baby clothes from Mom and Dad.

Victoria looks at the stack of presents in and out of their boxes and asks, "Where am I going to put all of this?"

"We'll hold onto it and send it when you get back to New York," Ashlee says.

It works for now, but Victoria thinks about her apartment and how she's not sure everything will fit in it anyway.

*

Victoria has regularly scheduled doctor's appointments all through the tour, never the same doctor or city twice. At the one in San Francisco, they do another ultrasound and find out she's having a boy. Victoria makes Gabe promise not to tell anyone yet.

Gabe misses only one appointment, when there's a press thing that overlaps. Danny takes her instead, and waits in the waiting room while she goes in to see the doctor.

It's weird not to have Gabe there with her, holding her hand and asking questions she doesn't think to.

"How'd it go?" Gabe asks the moment they get back.

"Good." Victoria sits down next to him and pokes him in the shoulder. "You worry too much."


	4. Third Trimester: August 2011

Their show in Seattle is amazing. Easily the best show of the tour. Every band is on, and the crowd loves them. Victoria comes off stage riding high on the adrenaline. More than high, really. More like super aware of her body.

"Now I know why people do this with someone else," she grumbles. "I am so fucking horny right now."

Gabe bursts into surprised laughter.

Nate smirks at her. "You're surrounded by men. Or we can find you a groupie."

"Fuck you," Victoria says.

"If you want," Nate slings back without missing a beat.

Victoria doesn't take him up on the offer.

What she does do is go to bed early and wriggle out of her clothes in the cramped space of her bunk. She's still completely aware of her body, the sensitive fullness of her breasts, the growing curve of her stomach, the heat of her cunt.

It's shocking, how fast she comes once she touches herself. She hasn't done this in a while; touring usually just makes her want to sleep once she's in a bed, and this tour she's been so focused on her body as the support system for her son that she hasn't been thinking about it in terms of sex.

The orgasm is good, but almost too fast for her to enjoy. She cups her hands around her stomach and whispers, "I hope you don't remember any of this," to the baby.

Victoria keeps just touching herself, stroking her hands over her body, not even trying to get herself off yet, just enjoying the touch. Every touch to her breasts feels like it's sending sparks all through her.

She touches with more intent, pressing firmer touches to the curves of her breasts and tracing her fingertips around her nipples. Her breasts are so sensitive that Victoria bites her lip to keep herself from moaning out loud and letting everyone else in on what she's doing.

She slides one hand down over the curve of her stomach and between her legs. She closes her eyes and pushes two fingers into herself, presses the heel of her hand against her clit.

It's not going to take long this time either.

She rocks against her hand, applies the barest of pressure to her nipple, fights not to make a sound.

Someone must open the door between the bunks and the lounge because there's a burst of sound: people talking, music, a video game, and Gabe's laughter cascading over everything else.

Victoria's whole body arches up into her hands as she comes. She gasps for air as quietly as she can, trembling with just how good it feels.

She wants to just curl into her pillow and sleep, but she knows that if she doesn't put her clothes back on, she'll regret it in the morning when she forgets and rolls out of her bunk naked, so she squirms back into her pajamas before she lets herself sleep.

*

They have a day off in Chicago. Victoria's pretty sure Gabe asked for it, and they have plans to meet up with The Academy guys for dinner.

Gabe goes with her to a doctor's appointment after a meal that's lunch for her and breakfast for him, and then asks, "Want to come with me to visit Bill?"

Victoria likes Bill, has spent a lot of time on tour with him, but they're not friends the way Gabe and Bill are. "I won't get in the way of whatever manly bonding you have planned?"

Gabe holds the door of the cab for her. "We were just going to hang out at his place, and he has a three-year-old who's into finger painting and tiaras. I don't think you'll be in the way." Gabe closes the door and goes around to the other side. "You in?"

"I'm in," she says, and Gabe gives the driver Bill's address instead of the venue. It's a bit of a drive, and Gabe spends much of it texting or doing whatever else he does with his phone. Victoria checks her messages and then looks out the window and watches Chicago pass by.

Bill's house is in a nice neighborhood, with children's toys in half the yards on the block, including his. Gabe pays the cab driver, and they walk up the path to the front door. The cushions on the porch swing match the house's paint.

Bill answers the door with a grin. "Gabe!" They hug for a long time, and then Bill reaches out for Victoria. "You came!"

Victoria's grinning, too, when Bill lets go of her and ushers them into the house. "Gabe said I wouldn't get in your way."

"Not at all." Bill takes them down the hallway into the living room. "We're glad to have you."

"Uncle Gabe!" A toddler who must be Genevieve hurls herself at Gabe, and he scoops her up easily.

"Mi amor!" Gabe kisses her cheek and turns her to Victoria. "This is my friend Victoria. Victoria this lovely lady is Genevieve."

She's a cute kid, with dark blonde hair and amazing bone structure, but Victoria wouldn't expect anything else.

"Nice to meet you," Victoria says.

Genevieve looks at her for a very long moment. "Hi," she says, and then she tugs at Gabe's shirt. "Come see my painting."

"Just a minute," Gabe says. "Let me say hi to your mom."

While Victoria's been meeting Genevieve, Christine's joined them. She steps around Bill to hug Gabe for long enough that Genevieve says, "Mommy," in as exasperated a tone as a three-year-old can produce.

Gabe draws back, and Christine turns to Victoria. "It's good to see you again." She hugs Victoria, too, a real hug instead of a brief touch, which is new. They don't know each other that well.

"You too," Victoria manages.

Christine steps back and says, "Go see Genevieve's painting. I'm going to take Victoria on a tour of the house."

Gabe and Bill go with Genevieve in one direction, and Christine takes Victoria in the other direction. While Christine chatters on about paint colors, furniture acquisitions, and portioning out separate spaces for herself and Bill, Victoria notices Genevieve's drawings on the fridge, the low shelves full of children's books, and the completely different scale of the furniture in Genevieve's room.

Christine ends the tour in her studio, which has a pair of chairs along with three easels, a desk, and a storage thing full of art supplies. "And that's the house."

"It's a great house." Victoria sits down and looks around at what is clearly an adult space. "Nice studio."

Christine smiles at her. "It's part of the reason we bought it. I would go crazy without a studio. Our old place didn't have enough space for this kind of thing. I was always picking baby socks out of my supply drawers." She leans forward. "Bill was on the road most of the time I was pregnant," she starts. "So I know what it's like to do this alone, even if you have some support."

"It's not that bad," Victoria says, unconsciously resting her hands over her stomach. "The boys are a lot of help." Which is true, even if it's mostly Gabe.

Christine doesn't look convinced. "So was my mom, but it was still hard." She holds out a hand. "Give me your phone. I'll give you my number. You can call me if you ever want to talk."

Victoria hands over her phone. "Thanks." Then something occurs to her, and when Christine hands her phone back, she asks, "Did Gabe bring me here just so you could give me your number?"

"He might have." Christine shrugs and pushes her hair back. "Bill says he's pretty excited about the baby. Are you excited?"

Victoria rubs her stomach. "Yeah." She grimaces. "Shit. I don't know what I'm doing. A baby, fuck. How hard is it, really?"

"Really fucking hard sometimes," Christine says. "And giving birth hurts like nothing else. But sometimes it's amazing, and I still can't believe I could ever love another person that much. Genevieve and Bill."

Victoria's hit with a sudden longing for what Christine has with Bill, someone to be there and love her and be the father to her kid. To her horror, she starts to cry, and can't stop.

Christine hands her a Kleenex, and then scoots her chair right up next to Victoria's and puts an arm around her.

Footsteps come down the hall toward them, stop, and go away again. Victoria keeps her head down and cries as quietly as she can. Christine just lets her and hands her another Kleenex when she needs it.

Different footsteps come down the hall - Gabe's this time - and come into the room. "Babe," Gabe says, crouching down in front of her, "what's wrong?"

Victoria feels a sudden rush of gratitude for Gabe, for him just being there, for him being there for _everything_ , and it makes her cry even harder.

"Babe," Gabe says again, sounding helpless. He wraps his arms around her shoulders and presses as close as he can with the awkward angle.

Victoria keeps crying for what seems like a long time. When she trails off into the last sniffles, she pushes Gabe away.

"What was that about?" Gabe asks.

Victoria shrugs and scrubs at her eyes with the last Kleenex.

"You okay?"

Victoria shrugs again.

Gabe sighs and rests his hands on her knees. "Babe, you're freaking me out here."

Victoria can't help laughing, a weak, hiccuping thing. "I'm okay," she says. "I guess. It's just." She waves a hand.

Gabe presses a kiss to her forehead. "Everything's going to be okay." He pushes to his feet and holds out a hand. "Bill and Christine took Genevieve outside to the kiddie pool. You up for it?"

Victoria takes his hand and lets him pull her out of the chair. "Yeah, I think so. Just give me a minute." She goes into the bathroom where she splashes water on her face, wipes the mascara tracks off her cheeks, and fixes her makeup.

When she comes out, Gabe is leaning against the wall across the hallway from the bathroom. He puts his arm around her shoulders and walks her through the house and out into the backyard.

They really do have a kiddie pool set up, with a handful of plastic chairs half in it. Bill and Christine are in two of the chairs with their feet in the water while Genevieve splashes around in the pool itself. She's wearing the cutest swimsuit Victoria has ever seen. It has a pattern of giant purple flowers and a skirt.

Gabe holds Victoria's arm as she kicks off her shoes and steps into the pool to sit down next to Christine. Gabe takes the chair on her other side.

"Sorry," Victoria says to Christine.

Christine pats her arm. "I cried pretty much the whole seventh month," she says.

On the other side of her, Bill grimaces, which makes Gabe snort, and Christine turns to see the look and hits him on the shoulder.

"And then you got to go off on tour," she says to him, "while I just kept crying."

Bill takes her hand. "And by the time I got back, Genevieve was doing all the crying." He and Christine both look down at Genevieve playing with her floaty toys in the pool. The look on their faces is one of complete and utter love.

Genevieve seems to feel them watching her, because she looks up and grins at the attention. "Uncle Gabe, play with me." She holds out a fish. Gabe takes it and leans over to swim it through the water toward her.

Christine shakes her head. "That kid of yours is going to be so spoiled." She kicks her foot to splash water at Gabe. "You thought about names yet?"

Gabe doesn't look up, but he tips his head to the side so Victoria knows he's listening. He, along with everyone else she knows, has been suggesting names for months.

"It's a boy," Victoria tells her, "so I'm not naming him after you."

Gabe actually laughs at that, and says, "So we're telling people now?" still without looking up.

This time Victoria kicks water at him.

Bill says, "William is a nice boy's name."

"Or Christian," Christine says with a lazy grin.

"Tyler," Victoria surprises herself by saying. She's been thinking it, but she wasn't sure she was really ready to say it yet. "His name's Tyler."

Gabe curls his hand around her ankle under the water. "Tyler," he repeats. He lets go of her and commandeers one of Genevieve's boats.

"When you fall in," Victoria warns, because Gabe is leaning awfully far out over the pool, "I'm not going with you when you have to go back and change."

"I'll laugh," Bill volunteers.

Gabe ignores them and keeps pushing toys around with Genevieve.

Gabe doesn't actually fall in, and he, Victoria, and Bill stay outside and exchange news and stories when Christine takes Genevieve inside to change out of her swimsuit and have a snack.

"My mom," Christine explains. "She's coming over to watch Genevieve while we go out, and she hates it when she's still in her suit. Otherwise we just let her run around in it all afternoon as long as she stays off the carpet when it's wet."

When they go inside, Gabe and Victoria take the couch, Christine sits down in a rocking chair, and Bill wanders around picking things up and taking them to other rooms in the house.

Genevieve comes up to Victoria and just kind of looks at her.

Gabe picks her up and sets her down in his lap. "Victoria's going to have a baby," he explains.

"Like Mrs. Whiskers!"

"The neighbor's cat," Christine explains.

"Kind of like that, yeah."

"He's kicking," Victoria says. "Do you want to feel it?"

Genevieve looks up at Gabe and waits for him to nod before she reaches out toward Victoria.

Victoria takes her hand and puts it over where Tyler's been kicking the most. She can tell when he does it again hard enough to be felt, because Genevieve's eyes get really big and she squirms with her whole body.

"It kicked me!" Genevieve leans over to put both her hands on Victoria's stomach, and this time she jerks them both back and claps them together. "Mommy, it kicked me!"

"You used to do that," Christine tells her, "when you were in my tummy."

Genevieve looks at her mom and then Victoria with wide eyes. "Oh." She flings her whole body onto Victoria, her arms spread wide around Victoria's stomach.

Victoria oofs but says, "I'm okay," when both Gabe and Christine look like they're about to come to her rescue.

"He can hear you if you talk to him," Victoria tells her.

Genevieve looks up at her. "He can?"

Victoria runs her hand over Genevieve's hair. "He can. I talk to him all the time."

"What do you tell him?"

"All kinds of things," Victoria answers. "And your Uncle Gabe and I read him books."

Genevieve scrambles up. "I want to read him a book!" She runs off and comes back clutching a book. She clambers up between Gabe and Victoria and opens the book.

She can't actually read yet, but she points out the animals on the page and can name a handful of them: "Cow, duck, horsie."

She reads three books to the baby that way, and then sits in Gabe's lap and makes him read a book in Spanish.

The doorbell rings while Genevieve's choosing another book, and she comes careening down the hall to meet Christine at the door. "Grandma!"

Christine comes back with an older woman carrying Genevieve. Bill and Gabe both get up to greet her.

"You remember Gabe," Bill says.

"Of course." The woman who can only be Christine's mom leans up and Gabe leans down so they can exchange kisses on the cheek.

"It's good to see you again," Gabe says.

"And this is Victoria," Christine says. "This is my mom, Bobbi."

"Victoria's going to have a baby," Genevieve announces. "I read to it."

"You did?" Bobbi says before she shakes Victoria's hand.

"I did! And Uncle Gabe played in the pool with me."

"Oh, that sounds like fun," Bobbi says.

"Give us ten minutes to get ready," Christine says, "and then we can go."

Genevieve spends most of the time - Christine's ten minutes stretches out to be more like fifteen - showing her grandma her favorite toys and occasionally running back to put her hands on Victoria's stomach and feel Tyler kick.

Bill and Christine come back dressed to go out. Bill has his arm around Christine's waist, and there's a flush high on Christine's cheeks that isn't just makeup.

"Mommy, you're so pretty!" Genevieve goes to her mom to be picked up while Bill talks to Bobbi.

"With Gabe and Victoria here, she hasn't had a nap, so she'll probably crash early. We'll call if we're going to be later than midnight." Bill takes Genevieve from Christine and kisses her cheek. "You have fun with Grandma." He passes her on to Gabe.

"Ah, mi amor," Gabe says. "I had the best afternoon."

"Me too!" Genevieve plants a sloppy kiss on Gabe's cheek and lays her head on his shoulder. "I love you, Uncle Gabe."

"I love you too." Gabe kisses the top of Genevieve's head. "Can you say goodbye to Victoria too?"

Genevieve nods against his shoulder and waves at Victoria. "Bye-bye."

Victoria waves back. "Bye, Genevieve. Thank you for reading to the baby."

Gabe hands Genevieve over to her grandmother, but not before he kisses her cheek again.

Bobbi and Genevieve stand on the front porch and wave at them as they get into Bill and Christine's car. Gabe twists around and waves through the back window until they turn the corner.

Then he turns back and says, "I fucking love your kid."

Bill grins in the rearview mirror. "She's pretty great." Then he smirks. "Even more awesome than Tyler's going to be."

"No way," Gabe replies instantly. "Tyler's a Cobra. That automatically makes him more awesome than your kid."

Victoria can see his hands twitching restlessly, so she reaches out for one of them and puts it over her stomach so he can feel Tyler moving.

*

They leave Chicago early the next morning, after their show. Most of the bus goes to sleep, but Gabe never sleeps when they're moving and Victoria's worrying too much to sleep.

She curls up next to Gabe on the couch, leans in to put her head on his shoulder, and pulls his hand down over her stomach.

"Not tired?"

"Exhausted."

Gabe rubs her stomach. "Tyler keeping you up?"

"Sort of." Victoria sighs. "Being at Bill and Christine's. I don't know. Seeing their house." She sighs again. "I think I have to move to a bigger place."

"Yeah," Gabe says. "I've been thinking about that." He squeezes her close. "Just hear me out, okay? I don't have anywhere to live. I stayed with my dad when we were last home. I've been thinking about buying a place big enough for you and Tyler too. You can co-own it or pay me rent or whatever."

Victoria laughs and turns her head into Gabe's shoulder. "Yeah, right. You don't want to live with a baby. He's going to cry all the time, and it'll totally cramp your style."

"Did you really just say 'cramp my style'?"

Victoria looks up at Gabe laughing down at her before he turns serious again.

"Babe, I wouldn't offer to do this I didn't want to." Gabe plays with the ends of her hair. "I love kids. And I know you can do this by yourself, but you don't have to." He sighs and lets her hair drop. "Just think about it, okay? I would love to have Tyler cramp my style, and you'd have someone else around who can change diapers and take two-a.m. feedings."

"I'll think about it," Victoria promises on a yawn.

Gabe kisses the top of her head. "Good. Now go get some sleep."

At the door to the bunks, she turns back and says, "Thanks." She doesn't just mean his offer; she means everything from the time he invited her into his band to this very moment.

He seems to get it because he smiles softly, says, "You're welcome," and blows her a kiss.

*

They're on the home stretch, somewhere in Pennsylvania, all of them sick of life on a tour bus and Victoria's ankles swollen to the point she puts her feet up every time she sits down, when she sits down across from Gabe at the table and asks, "Are you sure you want to live with a baby?"

"I'm sure." Gabe looks like he can barely contain himself. "You in?"

Victoria's so used to having Gabe around, so used to him being a part of her whole pregnancy. As much as she knows she could be a kick-ass single mom, she doesn't want to have to give it up when they get home from tour.

"I'm in," she says, and Gabe whoops loud enough that Ryland yells at him to keep it down.

"I've had my realtor - a new one, with a confidentiality agreement - looking for places," Gabe says. "I can show you the listings for the ones that look good, and we can go look at places when we get back."

"You knew I'd say yes," Victoria accuses him.

"She's been sending me listings for smaller places too."

Victoria's still a little suspicious, but she only says, "Okay, show me what we're looking at."

Gabe gets his laptop and Victoria vetoes half the places the realtor sent him.

"I'm narrowing it down," she says, when he sighs heavily at another place she turns down.

"You're pickier than I am." Gabe keeps taking her through listings until they have a reasonable number of places to look at when they get home.

"Real estate?" Ryland asks when he wanders by and sees what they're doing.

"Victoria," Gabe declares, "has agreed to be my roommate."

"Watch out," Alex calls from down the bus. "He'll lock you out one day and keep Tyler for himself."

"Fuck you," Gabe yells back. "I wouldn't take him away from his mom."

Nate sits down across from Victoria with a plate of reheated leftovers. "If you're living with him, does this mean I get out of babysitting?"

"Sometimes," Gabe says very patiently, "mommies and daddies like to go out without their kids, and that's when big brothers have to stay home and watch their little brothers."

Nate flips him off and asks, "Do big brothers get their own rooms?"

"No way," Victoria says. "You'd only draw dicks all over it and I hate repainting."

"So what," Nate says, "no guest room?"

"Just a couch," Gabe says. He reaches across the table and ruffles Nate's hair. "I know you miss the basement, but now it's time for you to live on your own."

Nate ducks out from under his hand.

Alex comes to look over Gabe and Victoria's shoulders. "It's been, like, five years since the basement." He points at the listing on the screen. "Not that place. Shitty kitchen."

"Apartment hunting by committee," Gabe grumbles, but there's a smile on his face, and Victoria knows he loves it.

*

They finish the tour rather improbably in Rhode Island.

"So you know," Gabe tells the crowd as he crosses the stage to Victoria, "that our very own Victoria is about to become a mother."

The crowd responds with a roar that only makes Gabe grin harder.

"And this is our last show before that happens," he continues. "So we have a little surprise for Victoria and the baby."

This is when Victoria starts to worry, because this is something she hasn't been in on, and she knows what sort of antics Gabe likes to get up to.

"And we need your help."

Ryland plays a little riff and Nate plays a roll on the snare.

Gabe puts his arm around Victoria. "So sing along, if you know the words." He smacks a kiss onto Victoria's cheek, and then crosses the stage again as the rest of the band starts to play.

Gabe sings the absolute dirtiest version of "Hush, Little Baby" that Victoria's ever heard. It's actually pretty impressive given that the only change he makes to the lyrics is to substitute "Papi" for "Papa."

When they finish, the crowd yells for them. Victoria steps up to her mic before Gabe can launch into his next bit of patter.

"If you think that's going to get you anywhere near my kid," she says, throwing him a warning look that's both big enough to be seen from the back row and completely manufactured.

"Aww, baby," he croons. "Don't be like that. You know I'm the best uncle ever."

Before Victoria can even come up with a comeback, Ryland says, "Gabe's the kind of uncle who takes you out and gets you drunk. When you're thirteen."

The crowd laughs and hollers, and Gabe launches into a possibly fabricated story about the first time he got drunk.

Victoria uses the moment to revel in just how fucking much she loves this.

*

Victoria doesn't even bother to argue when Gabe insists on helping her get home when they get back to New York. By now she knows it's not going to do any good. She's even grateful for the help when they get there and have to ferry suitcases and boxes of fan gifts upstairs. Thank God the elevator's working.

Victoria leaves Gabe unloading things onto her floor of the building while she goes down the hall to unlock the door. Gizmo comes running as soon as she opens it. He leaps as high as he can and rests his paws against her legs, his tail wagging wildly.

Victoria lets the bag over her shoulder slip to the floor as she carefully crouches to scoop him up. "Hi, baby."

Gizmo's tail keeps going, and he licks sloppily over her face.

Victoria laughs and holds him closer. "Oh, I missed you too." She finally looks up from Gizmo to find Amber practically vibrating in the doorway. Victoria puts Gizmo down to yap at them from the floor.

"Look at you!" Amber rushes forward as soon as Victoria's arms are free.

"I'm huge!" Victoria laughs. She hugs Amber back, both of them bouncing a little.

"No, you look amazing," Amber says. She steps back a little and looks Victoria over. "Totally amazing." She steps in and they hug again.

"You ladies going to stand around or are you going to help?" Gabe calls from down the hall.

"I'm in a delicate condition," Victoria calls back.

"He's flipping you off," Amber reports.

"Let him." Victoria takes Gizmo and the bag she'd dropped onto the floor into her place. Four months away, and it's totally unfamiliar to her, so different from their tour bus and the occasional hotel room.

"Okay, baby," she says to Gizmo, "you have to stay out of the way. I don't want Gabe stepping on you."

"I'm very careful," Gabe says from the doorway. He drops one of her bags in the hallway, smirks, and heads back out to grab the rest of it.

"I'll help," Amber volunteers.

Victoria goes with them, and it only takes one more trip to get everything inside, even with Gizmo running around underfoot.

"The boxes enough out of your way?" Gabe asks. "You could just leave them there."

The boxes are stacked along her hallway, but there's enough room for her to get by them, even as big as she is.

"Yeah, they're good."

Gabe hugs her tight. "Okay, babe. I'm headed out to Jersey to see my pops." He kisses the top of her head. "We have an appointment with the realtor at one tomorrow. I'll pick you up. Call me if you need anything before then."

Victoria rolls her eyes. "I think I'll be okay until tomorrow afternoon."

Gabe leans down and says to her stomach, "You be good for your mamá and I'll sing you something tomorrow."

"I don't think he's old enough to be bribed yet," Victoria says.

Gabe smiles up at her with his adorable little boy grin. "Never too early to start bribing them."

Victoria can't resist smiling back at him. "That's not what all the books you made me read say."

"I'm the bad influence," Gabe reminds her. He hugs her again and says, "I'll see you tomorrow," before grabbing his bags and leaving.

"Realtor?" Amber asks.

"Realtor." Victoria heads past her to the couch and lets Gizmo jump up onto her lap. "We're going in on an apartment together."

"That sounds serious." Amber settles down on the other end of the couch.

"It's not like that," Victoria protests.

Amber doesn't look impressed. Maybe Victoria should have told her earlier, over the phone where she wouldn't have to see Amber's skepticism.

"Really, it's not. He needs a new place to live and I don't think this place is big enough for me and Gizmo and a baby, and he's willing to help out with Tyler, so it makes sense."

Amber throws a cushion at her that Victoria barely deflects before it hits Gizmo. "You're practically married already."

"Whatever." Victoria cuddles Gizmo under her chin. "Gabe and I aren't like that."

"Sure you're not," Amber says.

"We're not!" Victoria changes the subject. "I love your dress."

Amber glares at her, but goes with it. "I found it in this awesome vintage place. The woman running it's about seventy years old, and she has the best stuff. Dresses, shoes, and this really kickass collection of jewelry. I have to take you there."

Victoria pats her stomach. "After Tyler's born. I won't fit into anything vintage now, and I don't want more stuff I'm just going to have to pack." She looks around the living room. "Fuck. Packing's going to be a bitch."

"I'll help," Amber offers.

"That's why you're my best friend."

*

Gabe texts her at 11:30 and asks what she wants for lunch, and then shows up at noon with pepperoni pizza for her and vegetarian for him. Victoria feeds Gizmo slices of pepperoni and lets him lick her fingers.

"Baby spit up's going to be nothing to you," Gabe says.

"Human saliva has way more bacteria than dog saliva," Victoria counters. Before they leave, she washes her hands under Gabe's watchful eye.

In the cab on the way to the first building, Gabe says, "We don't have to do all of them today. If you need to rest, we'll stop."

Victoria nods and rubs her stomach where it feels like Tyler's tossing and turning. "Okay."

They meet the realtor in the lobby. She's exactly what Victoria would expect of a realtor based on what she's seen of them on TV: blonde hair, perfectly made up, expensive suit and heels.

She comes toward them with her right hand already extended. "Gabe, good to see you again." She shakes Gabe's hand and then says, "And you must be Victoria."

"Uh, yeah." Victoria shakes her hand.

"I'm Diane. It's so nice to meet you." Diane holds out an arm toward the elevator. "Should we go up?" She takes them into the elevator and keeps talking. "Gabe tells me you've looked at the listings for all the places we're going to look at today."

"Yeah, our whole band did." Victoria exchanges a smile with Gabe.

"Great," Diane says. "So you know what we're in for. Everything we're looking at today is pre-war, converted to residential in the last thirty years, twenty-four hour doormen, basement storage." The elevator dings for their floor, and Diane leads them down the hall to first apartment.

Gabe asks a lot of questions and takes notes on his phone. Victoria shouldn't be surprised by how knowledgeable and businesslike he is - he has done this before, and he has a head for business - but she is, and somehow that, more than anything, brings home how real this is. She's buying _real estate_ with _Gabe_.

She takes in the first two places in something of a daze.

The third place, in a building just around the corner from Gabe and Bianca's old place, catches her attention. It has the high ceilings and large windows Gabe likes. The floors are wood, and beautiful. The previous owners painted one of the kitchen walls a deep turquoise and one in the living room a deep purple.

While Diane tells Gabe whatever it is realtors tell people about places they're trying to sell, Victoria wanders down the hall to look at the rest of the place.

Gabe finds her ten minutes later looking out the windows of one of the bedrooms. "Babe?"

"This is Tyler's room." Victoria turns around. "The one across the hall is mine. You get the master."

"We still have three more places to look at," Gabe says mildly.

"It doesn't matter. This is it." Victoria walks up to him so she's only inches away. "You saw the purple wall."

Gabe's mouth turns up into a smile. "It does seem like a sign."

Gabe pokes at everything, turns on faucets, opens and closes windows and doors, flips light switches. He also asks a million questions. Victoria listens to the ones about the fixtures and cabinetry and ignores the ones about the list price and co-op fees. She trusts Gabe with all of that.

Gabe tells Diane they want to make an offer, and they take a cab back to her office to talk their way through all the details that go into that. Victoria never knew this was so complicated, and she completely zones out on the discussion, only snapping back to it when Gabe asks if there's anything she wants to add to it.

She says, "No," and her exhaustion must come through, because he touches her arm gently and gets them out of there less than ten minutes later.

"You were supposed to tell me when you were tired," he admonishes. He flags down a cab and holds the door for her before going around to the other side.

"I wanted to get it done."

"We could have done it tomorrow." Gabe takes her hand. "It's not worth wearing you out."

Victoria groans. "You're so overprotective." She squeezes his hand. "I'm okay, and we need to do this as soon as possible. I'm still going to have to pack, and Tyler needs a crib and whatever else I don't have yet."

"Babe," Gabe says, "it'll be okay. We have the list of what you got at the baby shower, and we can sort through the boxes of gifts before we move if you want so you know what else you don't need, and you can hire movers to pack for you."

"It just seems like so much work." Victoria's annoyed at the tremble in her voice. She's been so good at not crying recently.

Gabe scoots over and puts his arms around her. "It's going to be fine. My shit's all packed already, so I can help with yours. And then we're going to have enough space for you and me and Tyler and Gizmo, and it's going to be great." He kisses the top of her head. "I promise."

"You can't know that," Victoria says against his shoulder. She doesn't start crying, though.

"Of course I can," Gabe says. "I'm Gabe Saporta, and I can do that."

It works to make her laugh.

"There you go." Gabe doesn't let go of her until the cab stops in front of her building.

*

Victoria spends the next two days sleeping late, doing laundry, and taking Gizmo out for walks. Gabe calls or texts at least twice a day, once with an update about the apartment counteroffer, but mostly just to talk to her.

On the third day, Gabe comes over and they sit on the floor to sort through the boxes of gifts from fans.

"I love our fans," Victoria says, "but some of them have terrible taste." She holds up a mustard yellow t-shirt with the slogan "Baby's Baby" in a hideous brown so Gabe can see it before she tosses it into the box of stuff they're giving away.

"And people think I dress badly." Gabe holds up another shirt. "How do you feel about putting Tyler in pink?"

Victoria shrugs. "Sure. No skirts, though."

Gabe carefully folds the pink shirt and puts it in the keep box.

Except for the books, they weren't very careful about how they packed things up on tour, so clothes, toys, and baby blankets are all mixed together. Gabe makes her repack the things they're keeping much more neatly. He also keeps a tally that he adds on to the list from the baby shower.

"You don't need to buy clothes for the first year."

"Or blankets ever." Victoria scoots over next to Gabe so she can look at the list too as he scrolls through it. "We need a list of what I do need to buy."

Gabe starts a new list. Victoria puts furniture at the top of it. Gabe adds a car seat and a stroller.

"This is a week's worth of shopping right here," Gabe says.

Victoria groans. "And I don't want to do any of it before we move."

Gabe puts his arm around her. "Some it's stuff we can pick out and have delivered later."

Victoria pulls up the calendar on her phone. It has a blissful stretch of free days interspersed with her last handful of doctor's appointments. "When are we going?"

Gabe looks down at her calendar. "After your appointment on Tuesday?"

Victoria adds it to the calendar and then puts her phone down. "Sometimes I still can't believe I'm going to be a mom."

"Me either," Gabe says. "It seems like just yesterday you were this quiet little girl whose ex Alex knew."

Victoria sighs and then says, "Speaking of exes."

Gabe stiffens next to her, and she doesn't turn to see what kind of look is on his face.

"I don't know what I need to do about Jack, to make sure he can't have Tyler."

Gabe exhales a heavy breath. "I got the name of a lawyer. She's supposed to be very, very good. Her assistant said she'd squeeze you in whenever you called." Gabe picks up her phone and puts the number into it. "I can come with you."

"No." Victoria turns so she can hug Gabe. "I need to do this one myself."

*

Victoria calls Ashlee that evening.

"Sweetie," Ashlee answers, "I was just thinking about you."

Ashlee never fails to make her smile.

"It's been way too long," Victoria says. "How are you?"

"Amazing," Ashlee says. "Pete took Bronx to the park and out to dinner for some father-son time, and I've been lazing around the house all day. But how are you?"

"Overwhelmed," Victoria admits. "I'm huge, I keep crying for no reason, and I have boxes of baby stuff cluttering up my hallway."

"Oh, sweetie. It's only a couple more months. I know it's a total cliche, but you'll forget all about this when you see your baby."

"You didn't do it again, though," Victoria points out.

"Not yet," Ashlee says. "There's still time."

"Do you want more?"

"I don't know. Pete would do it, but we're both so busy. I'm not sure it would be fair to split up the time we have for Bronx now. Are you thinking about having more kids already?"

Victoria groans. "I just want to get through this one. Did you know Gabe and I are buying a place?"

"Pete mentioned it."

"Yeah, so that's making this all a little more stressful. I can't do all the shopping I need to do because we're just going to move. Plus I have to go talk to a lawyer to make sure Jack can't get anywhere near Tyler - did I tell you I'm naming him Tyler? - and I think I hurt Gabe's feelings when I told him he couldn't come with me for that."

"He'll get over it, you didn't, and that asshole has no right to your kid."

"Thanks," Victoria says, and then she sniffles and her eyes well up with tears. "Shit. I'm crying again."

"I cried so much when I was pregnant. Pete didn't know what do. He kept trying to feed me ice cream."

Victoria manages a watery laugh. "Gabe keeps telling me it'll be okay."

"You should listen to him," Ashlee says softly. "He's right about that."

*

Victoria meets Amber for brunch on Sunday, and then they go back to Victoria's and pack all of her pre-pregnancy clothes and shoes - she's been wearing only flats for a couple of months now - into boxes.

"Fuck," Victoria says. "Thank God we're starting this early." She puts her hands at the small of her back and stretches.

Amber looks around her bedroom. "This is going to take a while."

"We don't have to do everything. Gabe says I should hire movers. They can take care of a lot of it. We just have to do the stuff I don't want them getting into."

"Well, we already got your underwear drawer." Amber points at her. "You've been holding out on me."

Victoria flushes. "Yeah, I kind of ramped up my lingerie collection for a while there."

"How tired are you?" Amber asks. "I could go for something new. You can take me wherever you were shopping."

One of the things Victoria doesn't like about being pregnant is that the clothes aren't as exciting. Even if she can't buy anything, she can look. "We have to stop for lunch on the way."

Amber agrees, and they stop for sandwiches before Victoria takes her to La Petite Coquette where Rebecca, the owner, buzzes them in. Victoria helps Amber pick out a bunch of things to try on and then sits down in a chair by the dressing room to offer her opinion.

When Amber gets to a red satin and lace negligee that Victoria owns in black, Victoria starts to cry. She's really starting to hate that.

Amber comes right over and wraps her arms around her. "Don't cry," she says.

"It's just the stupid pregnancy hormones," Victoria chokes out. "And you look so good, and I have the same thing in black, and I'm never going to have anyone to wear it for again."

"Oh, V," Amber says. "That's not true."

"It is." Victoria digs into her purse for the package of Kleenex she knows is in there. "No one's going to want to date me with Tyler around."

"Plenty of single moms date." Amber takes her purse from her and finds the Kleenex. "You'll have someone to wear all that stuff for again."

Victoria takes the Kleenex from her and wipes her eyes. "I don't think so," she sniffles.

Amber hugs her tight again. "Of course you will."

Rebecca brings her a glass of water, and Victoria calms down enough for Amber to keep trying things on. She doesn't buy the negligee.

*

Gabe picks her up on Tuesday morning and goes with her to see Doctor Sanders. Her chart, with paperwork from doctors all over the country, is insanely thick.

"I'm glad to see you kept up with your appointments," Doctor Sanders says.

Victoria rubs her stomach. "I want what's best for Tyler." She smiles at Doctor Sanders. "That's what I'm naming him."

Doctor Sanders smiles back at her. "That's a nice name. It's good that you're using it already." She puts Victoria's chart down on the counter. "How are you feeling?"

Victoria tells her the same thing she told Ashlee: "A little overwhelmed. I keep crying."

Doctor Sanders nods. "That can happen. How often are you crying?"

Victoria shrugs. "Maybe every day or every other day."

Gabe puts his hand in the center of her back. Victoria takes in a deep breath; it's comforting to feel his hand there.

"The best thing you can do for that," Doctor Sanders says, "is just keep your stress levels down."

Victoria laughs. "I'm not sure that's going to happen. We're trying to buy an apartment and move before Tyler's born."

"I'm doing most of the business stuff for the apartment, and Victoria's going to hire movers," Gabe says. He rubs his thumb against her back. "We're going to make this as easy on you as possible," he says softly.

"Moving is still a lot of stress. Keep an eye on it," Doctor Sanders says to both of them. "Make sure you take lots of breaks, and if you start crying more, call me. Some of it is just normal hormones, but if gets worse, we'll want to see if it's something we need to look into." She stands up and pats the table. "Hop on up, and let's see how Tyler's doing."

She does the poking and prodding and listening to Tyler's heartbeat that Victoria's used to by now. "Everything looks good to me. Do you have any questions?"

"What about a Lamaze class?" Gabe asks. "We're running a little late on that, but we should probably do something about it now." He smiles winningly at Doctor Sanders, and it seems like she likes him more than she likes Victoria.

Doctor Sanders gets a stapled sheaf of papers from a wall pocket and hands it to Gabe. "This is a list of childbirth classes in the area. If you're going to do one, you should decide what kind of class you want. Lamaze isn't your only option, although it is the one people are most familiar with."

"If?" Victoria asks.

"Childbirth classes can be helpful," Doctor Sanders says. "They connect you with other expecting moms, and give you another person you can ask questions. But you don't have to do them." She smiles at them. "I saw in the notes in your chart that you've been reading a lot and asking questions. That's pretty good prep. It's really up to what makes you the most comfortable."

It's not what they show on TV, but some of the books said the same thing.

"We'll think about it," Victoria says.

Gabe doesn't have any other questions, and neither does Victoria, so they get on a bus and head down to Union Square for lunch before they hit up Babies R Us.

"You didn't tell me you were crying so much."

Victoria's surprised it took him so long to bring it up.

"It's not a big deal. Really," she insists when he still looks worried. "You heard what Doctor Sanders said. It's just the hormones." She makes a face. "It's kind of embarrassing sometimes, but I'm dealing."

"Will you tell me if you're not?"

"Yes." Victoria reaches out to touch his hand. "I promise. If it gets worse, I'll tell you and Doctor Sanders."

Gabe turns his hand over and takes hers. "You can tell me to fuck off."

Victoria laughs. "I've lived with you on a fucking tour bus for years. I can handle you hassling me about my pregnancy crying."

Gabe taps his fingers against her hand. "Okay." He smirks. "Then I'll keep hassling." He lives up to it and says, "Do you want to do a childbirth class?"

Victoria sits back and pulls her hand away as the waiter brings their food. "I don't think so. I've talked to Ashlee and my mom, and every other woman who's ever given birth, and we've been reading books for months." She stops when something occurs to her, and her voice comes out a lot smaller when she asks, "You're going to be there, right?"

"Babe, yes." Gabe actually gets up and comes around to her side of the table where he crouches down and puts his arms around her, giant stomach and all. "Yes, of course I'm going to be there."

Victoria refuses to let that make her cry, but she does put her arms around him too and lean her cheek against the top of his head. Then she pulls back and says, "We're like a bad romantic comedy."

Gabe stands up and goes back to his own side of the table. "We're too cool for that. Maybe an independent student film." He flashes her a grin. "One of those ones where everything ends happily ever after."

After lunch, they spend two hours in Babies R Us adding things to a registry with a scanner until Victoria's too worn out to keep going. They catch a cab back to her place and spend the rest of the afternoon watching the second season of Gossip Girl on DVD.

*

On Thursday, Victoria gets up and dressed early and takes the subway downtown to meet with the lawyer. The office is horribly intimidating, everything luxurious and extravagant, and the assistant who walks Victoria down the hall is wearing an outfit more expensive than most of the items in even Victoria's wardrobe.

The lawyer herself is no less intimidating, even when she smiles and says, "Good morning. I'm Louise," and leads Victoria to a pair of chairs in the corner of her spacious office instead of sitting across the desk from her. Louise pours Victoria a glass of water and sits back with a legal pad on her knee. "What can I help you with?"

"Custody." Victoria gestures at her stomach. "He cheated on me, and then I found out I was pregnant, and I don't want him anywhere near my son."

Louise takes notes on her pad. "Are you in contact with him now?"

Victoria bites her lip. "No, but he has to know."

Louise quirks an eyebrow at her.

"I'm in a band," Victoria explains. "Cobra Starship. He's in another band, All Time Low, and people knew we were dating, and now that I'm pregnant, he has to know he's the father. I never cheated on him."

"But he hasn't contacted you?"

"No." Victoria flattens her hands over her stomach and lets Tyler kick at them. "Not since the end of the tour we were on when I got pregnant."

Louise nods. "That's good. The first thing you want to do is not to put his name on the birth certificate. It's only a stopgap measure. If he really wants to claim paternity, he can petition the court for a DNA test, but unless he does that, you will be your son's only legal parent. If he does petition the court, then things get trickier. The fact that he hasn't contacted you is good. It shows he doesn't have a vested interest in the child, and we can argue that in court."

"Court?" Victoria asks. "Would we have to do that?"

"I'm afraid so." Louise smiles, and it's not as comforting as Victoria would like. "New York State law provides for the rights and responsibilities of both parents. If he decides to go after custody, it would most likely go to court. It sounds like we have a good start on showing that he's an unfit parent. We might be able to have his rights terminated, but that's a long shot."

It's almost too much for Victoria to take in, and she wishes she'd brought Gabe after all.

"If you meet someone else," Louise continues, "and you want him to adopt, then it gets easier. If the biological father hasn't contacted the child for six months, then his rights can be involuntarily terminated in favor of a step-parent."

Marriage is so far from Victoria's mind. "What if we weren't married?" A boyfriend for life is way easier to comprehend.

"Second parent adoptions are legal in New York," Louise answers. "It could be done."

"But there's nothing I can do now?"

"Don't put his name on the birth certificate. You'll also want to write a will designating a guardian for your son in the event of your death. If you don't and the biological father asks for custody, he will almost certainly get it."

Victoria sucks in a breath. "No way. What do I need to do to make a will?"

They spend the rest of Victoria's appointment hashing out details of her will and making a list of what other information she needs to get to Louise, and she makes a follow-up appointment on her way out.

Victoria holds it together until she gets home, and then she holds Gizmo to her chest and cries, and she's pretty sure this isn't just hormones. Gizmo licks at her cheeks and whines fretfully, and she ignores the buzzing of her phone.

She washes her face after she's cried herself out, and puts her Victoria-Cobra-Midtown-Ivy League mix on so Tyler can hear his family's voices even though she's not up to talking.

She has three missed calls - one from her mom and two from Gabe - and two texts from Gabe: _How'd it go?_ and _In the city. Can I come over?_

She sends back, _Bring ice cream._

Gabe shows up an hour later. After she lets him in, he puts the shopping bag down on the stack of boxes still in the hallway and wraps his arms around her. It's enough to start her crying again.

"Babe," he says once, helplessly, and then they just stand there while she cries.

Victoria pulls back and rubs at her eyes with the heels of her hands. "You know where the bowls are." She goes to wipe her eyes for real, with a Kleenex this time, and grimaces at herself in the mirror. Her eyes are red and her whole face is puffy.

Gabe bought the good stuff, Häagen-Dazs chocolate chocolate chip, and he has a large bowl of it waiting for her. Tyler makes her too heavy to actually sit in Gabe's lap, but she gets as close to it as she can, pressed tight against him on the couch with her head on his shoulder.

"If he wants to," Victoria says, "he can petition the court for a paternity test, and then I'd have to go to court and fight for custody."

Gabe swears in Spanish and then in English. "He's never getting custody. We'll run away to a non-extradition country before that happens."

Victoria doesn't want to laugh, but she does. "Gabe."

"I'm serious." Gabe presses a kiss to her temple. "He's never getting Tyler. Keep your passport up to date."

Victoria sits up and turns to look at Gabe, because she thought so before, but now she's sure. "The lawyer's also drawing up a will for me, so he can't get Tyler if anything happens to me. Will you take Tyler if I die?"

Gabe's eyes get very wide, and his answer is almost too soft to be heard, but he says, "Yes. Yes, of course."

*

The next few weeks pass in a blur. Gabe takes Victoria shopping, to her doctor's appointments, and to his dad's house in Jersey for dinner. Amber comes over every weekend to help Victoria pack up bits and pieces of her apartment. Victoria signs the will Louise draws up for her and gathers up a seemingly endless collection of documents and information for the co-op application.

They have to go to an interview, too, where they answer questions about their intentions for the apartment, their finances, and their future as a band. Gabe is a hell of a lot richer than Victoria ever imagined, and half the interview board coos over Victoria's stomach and asks about paint colors for the nursery.

"I told you that would work to your advantage," Diane says when they call her on speakerphone to tell her how it went.

Two days later, she calls them back and tells them the co-op board approved their application. Two weeks after that, they sign a bunch of papers and Victoria becomes the co-owner of a ridiculously expensive apartment. Gabe dances her around the office, both of them laughing, and then makes plans to paint Tyler's room and let the place air out for a couple of days before they move in.

*

They go out to dinner with Gabe's dad, Alex and Lauren, Ryland and Meredith, and a handful of Gabe's other friends for Gabe's birthday. Diego heads back to Jersey afterwards while everyone else makes plans to go out.

"I'll meet up with you in a bit," Gabe says. "I'm going to take Victoria home."

Victoria rolls her eyes and lets him help her with her coat. "I can get home by myself."

"I don't mind."

Victoria wraps her scarf around her neck. "I do." Gabe hasn't moved away, and Victoria puts her hand on his chest. "It's your birthday. I'll let you put me in a cab, and I'll text you when I get home, but you're not coming with me."

Gabe hails her a cab. "Text me as soon as you get home."

"I will. I promise." Victoria leans up and kisses his cheek. "Stop worrying and go have fun."

She waits until she's all the way up in her apartment, Gizmo rushing around the packed boxes everywhere to jump on her, before she texts, _Home safe. Happy birthday! :)_

*

Moving day is a disaster. Victoria cries roughly twice an hour, and sometime in the middle of hour four, she yells at Gabe.

"This was a stupid idea! I can't believe I agreed to this!" She's crying, too, and the movers edge around them carefully. "I would've been better off by myself!" It wasn't even anything important that set her off, just a question of which way to turn the dining room table, and the movers are clearly trying to avoid the crazy pregnant lady, and Gabe gets this horrible pinched look on his face and picks up her phone from the counter.

Victoria's still crying fifteen minutes later, huddled on a corner of the couch, when Amber shows up.

"Come on, V," she says. "Let's get out of here for a while."

Victoria does her best to stop crying, and she and Amber take the bus back to Amber's place.

"I just fucking lost it," Victoria sniffles when she's curled up on Amber's couch instead of her own.

"Moving's stressful." Amber makes them both cups of chamomile tea with lots of honey.

Victoria wraps her hands around her mug and feels like shit. "I yelled at Gabe." She grimaces. "Like, a lot."

Amber puts an arm around her shoulders. "He'll understand."

"Maybe." Victoria sips her tea. They watch bad movies on cable all afternoon.

She doesn't let Amber come back with her when she goes home, but she does agree to take a cab instead of the subway.

The movers are gone, and Gabe is unpacking boxes in the kitchen. His face is as guarded as she's ever seen it when he looks up and asks, "Have you eaten?"

Victoria shakes her head. She doesn't quite know what to say. She bends down to scratch behind Gizmo's ears.

"Chinese?"

"Sure." Victoria digs through the stack of menus Gabe hands her until she finds one, and she calls in their order. She sits down at the dining room table - turned the way she'd wanted - and watches Gabe put things away in drawers and cabinets.

It's tense, and it doesn't get any better when the food gets there. They eat in the living room with the TV on the collection of video clips and reality shows MTV plays these days.

They switch to something with an actual plot later, but Victoria's too worn out to pay attention to it. She's the kind of tired that makes going to bed seem like more work than it's worth, but she forces herself off the couch. "I'm going to crash."

"I put your sheets on your bed," Gabe tells her, still cautious and quiet.

Victoria's so pathetically grateful she has to blink back tears. "Thanks," she manages around the lump in her throat.

She brushes her teeth, changes into pajamas, and falls into bed. Once she's there, she can't sleep, but cries quietly. She doesn't want to have ruined this before it even started.

"I'm sorry," she whispers to Tyler just in case.

She can hear Gabe's footsteps in the hall, and then the soft sound of her door opening. She doesn't quite dare to look, but she listens to Gabe come into her room and sit down on the edge of her bed. He touches her hair, and her next sob comes out as a loud gasp.

"Victoria," Gabe sighs.

"I'm sorry," she whispers. It's easier to apologize in the dark where she can't see him. "I didn't mean it. I didn't mean any of it."

The bed shifts, her sheets rustle, and then Gabe's there with her, lying at her back and resting one hand on her stomach. "Go to sleep," he whispers. "You and Tyler need the rest."

*

Victoria wakes up feeling still kind of wrung out, but better, like she hasn't fucked everything up. The floors are cold against her feet, and she pulls on a pair of socks before she shuffles out to the kitchen.

Gabe has a bowl of batter and a waffle iron she didn't even know they had out on the counter. "Waffle?"

"Yeah." Victoria comes around the counter while he pours batter into the waffle iron. After he closes the waffle iron, she wraps her arms around him and rests her head on his chest. "Thanks for putting up with me," she mumbles into his shirt.

Gabe hugs her back. "Someday," he says, his voice making his chest rumble against her cheek, "Tyler's not going to want to do his chores and I'm going to be able to tell him, 'I put up with your mom when she was pregnant with you. The least you can do is take out the garbage.'"

Victoria laughs, and then closes her eyes and breathes in the familiar smells of Gabe and laundry detergent. Gabe only pushes her away when her waffle's done. She takes the waffle, butter, and maple syrup - she didn't know they had that either - to the table, and Gabe brings her a glass of orange juice while he waits for the next waffle to cook.

"Did you go shopping?" Victoria's pretty sure they didn't have orange juice when they moved in yesterday.

"While you were out yesterday."

Gabe makes a pretty good waffle, and he drops batter for another one on the iron before he sits down with his. It's comfortable, and familiar, having breakfast with Gabe, although a little quieter and less cramped than their bus.

"The stuff for Tyler's room is getting delivered today." Gabe quirks his eyebrows at her. "You going to freak out about it?"

Victoria actually considers it. "No," she says, "I don't think so." She hooks her ankles around the rung of her chair. "I need slippers."

Gabe blinks a little at the change of subject, but he says, "Okay," and gets her a second waffle.

*

Victoria's tugging at the crib to make sure Gabe's assembled it correctly and it's not going to fall apart with Tyler in it when the buzzer sounds. Gabe goes to answer it, and he comes back a few minutes later with a delivery guy who deposits a giant box in the middle of the nursery. They already have a crib, a combination changing table and dresser, a toy box, and a bookshelf.

"What the fuck?"

Gabe grins at her. "A present. From me to you and Tyler." He takes to the package with the same pair of scissors he used to cut open the other boxes, and he carefully takes apart cardboard and packaging until he gets down to what's in the box. It's the most beautiful rocking chair Victoria has ever seen, made of some kind of lustrous, dark wood, with a high back and curved seat. When she runs her hand along the grain of it, it's completely smooth against her skin.

Gabe pulls the rest of the packaging out from under the rockers and says, "Try it out."

Victoria carefully lowers herself down into it and rocks experimentally. She can imagine sitting in it with Tyler in her arms. She puts her hands over her stomach and says, "Feel that? Gabe bought us a rocking chair." Tyler moves against her, and she smiles up at Gabe. "I think he likes it. Thank you. This is amazing."

Gabe smiles softly. "Well," he says, "I hadn't really gotten you anything yet."

Victoria gapes up at him. "You got me this _place_ , for starters. You made sure I didn't have to read the shitty baby books. You took care of publicity. You've been there for my doctor's appointments. Christ, Gabe, you've been the best fucking present I could've gotten."

Gabe's smile shades with a hint of embarrassment. He doesn't always take compliments well. "Does that mean you don't want the rocking chair?"

Victoria grips the chair's arms. "Hell no. I love the rocking chair. We're keeping this."

*

They spend a week unpacking and figuring out where to keep things in the common areas. They pack away most of the pregnancy and parenting books, and Gabe takes them to the basement storage while Victoria arranges the ones they're keeping handy on a shelf in the living room. They take turns running loads of baby clothes through the washing machine so they'll be soft and clean for Tyler. Gabe forbids Victoria to lift anything heavy.

They get everything put away and straightened out in time for the housewarming party Gabe already invited people to. They enlist Alex to cook, and he approves of their kitchen if not their kitchenware. Diego comes into the city and Nate flies out to spend a few days hanging out and come to the party.

"The party ends when you want it to," Gabe says beforehand. "You say the word, and we'll kick everyone out."

People bring gifts for the baby, bottles of wine, and desserts. Diego brings a bottle of sparkling cider for Victoria.

"Gabriel," Diego says in his heavily accented English, "is so happy to be a part of the life of you and your baby."

Victoria squeezes his arm. "I'm so happy to have him be a part of it too." She smiles. "He's a good boy."

Diego grins at her, an older version of Gabe's teasing grin, and says, "You don't have to lie to me. I know he can be a handful."

Victoria giggles. "He can, but he's been very helpful." They turn to look across the apartment at Gabe, and he grins at them. Every time Victoria looks for him, he's looking back. It's comforting to know he's there.

"Oh, no," Lauren laughs when Gabe looks at her as she's trying out the rocking chair. "Alex and I aren't having any. You'll have to rely on Victoria to provide the next generation of Cobras."

The party started early, so it breaks up early. Gabe sends Victoria to sit down and makes Nate help clean up.

"How did I get stuck with this?" he bitches. "I don't even live here."

"You don't have a girlfriend, and you're the baby," Gabe says. "That makes you my bitch."

Nate flips him off. "That's not fair." He tries appealing to Victoria. "Are you going to let him treat Tyler like this when he's the baby?"

"I'll be the one making Tyler clean up," Victoria says. "And don't think you're going to get out of it even when he's old enough to help. You'll always be our bitch."

Gabe walks by the couch and high-fives her.


	5. Birth: November 2011

Victoria does not take Nate's suggestion that she could be a pregnant nun for Halloween, and instead finds a pair of wings and a magic wand and declares herself to be a pregnancy fairy. Gabe buys a red suit, horns, and a tail. Victoria helps him paint his face red, and they hand out candy and meet a few of their neighbors who have kids. Victoria sends Gabe out to party while she goes to bed early and doesn't hear him come in.

After that, they settle into waiting. Victoria packs a bag that they can just grab when it's time to go to the hospital. Gabe makes dozens of empanadas and three kinds of soup he doles out into small portions and freezes so they'll have things to eat that they don't have to think about for the first couple of weeks. Gabe talks to Tyler in Spanish a lot, and Victoria shells out for Rosetta Stone software so she can learn enough to keep up. Victoria's back aches, and she spends a lot of time watching TV on the couch with Gabe's hands a constant touch massaging the aches out of her muscles.

Mom and Dad fly out the weekend before Thanksgiving with plans to stay at least until Tyler's born. Gabe agrees to help with Thanksgiving dinner as long as he doesn't have to have anything to do with the turkey, so he and Mom spend an afternoon at Whole Foods while Victoria takes a nap and Dad visits friends.

The night before Thanksgiving, Victoria has nightmares. She wakes up from one of them gasping for breath. She holds Gizmo close and tries to get her breath back. She's petting him and calming down when a wave of pain rolls through her stomach. It's not like the false labor contractions she's been having. She's pretty sure this is the real thing.

"Gabe." Her voice comes out barely loud enough to carry beyond her room. She takes in a deep breath and yells, "Gabe!"

He turns on the light when he comes in, and just that is a relief. It's a lot less scary in the dark.

"Babe, what is it?" He's still dressed, and she glances at the clock that tells her it's not even eleven. He must've still been up.

"I think I'm having contractions. The real ones." Victoria pushes herself up to sit against her headboard, and Gabe comes over to sit on the edge of the bed. He takes her hand.

"Okay," he says. "How long ago?"

Victoria shrugs. "A couple of minutes. And a few minutes before that, I think. I had a nightmare."

"You wanna get up, or you want to stay here until the next one?"

Victoria sighs heavily. "Let's walk. If it's not the real thing, that'll make them stop."

Gabe steps back so she can get out of bed, and then takes her elbow as they go out into the hall and make a couple of circuits of the apartment. They're in the kitchen when the next one hits, and Victoria grips at the counter and at Gabe.

When it's over, Gabe pulls a piece of paper off the pad on the counter and writes down the time. The numbers are a little shaky.

Gabe picks up the house phone, dials Doctor Sanders, and puts it on speaker. Victoria tells Doctor Sanders about her nightmare and the next two contractions.

"It's time to start timing them," Doctor Sanders says, "and call me back if your water breaks, if anything feels wrong, or when they've been coming every five minutes for an hour."

Victoria leans against Gabe after they hang up the phone.

"You want to call your mom?" he asks.

She shakes her head. "Not yet. This could go on for a long time." She's okay so far, and it's enough to have Gabe holding her up and walking her around the apartment. "They can sleep for a while longer."

Gabe kisses the top of her head.

They sit on the couch, walk, sit on the couch again. Gabe writes down each of her contractions, gives up when they don't get closer together, starts timing again when they do.

"Come on, Tyler, baby," Victoria mutters. "Let's do this thing."

It's hours of it before Gabe says, "They've been five minutes for the last hour," and gets up between contractions to get a phone.

Doctor Sanders talks to Victoria through a contraction, and says, "Okay, it sounds like it's time to come on in to the hospital. I'll meet you there."

Gabe calls a cab and gathers up her bag, coat, boots. "On a snowy night in November," he says. "This'll be a good story to tell someday."

Victoria leans against him through the pain of a contraction that hits in the elevator. "Every year on his birthday."

The cab's waiting for them downstairs, and Julio the night doorman says, "Good luck, Ms. Asher. Can't wait to meet the little one."

"Thanks," Victoria says, before another contraction hits and she has to wait for it to pass before she can get in the cab.

Gabe calls Mom and Dad, Amber, and his dad from the cab. Then he texts Alex, Ryland, and Nate, who are all visiting their families.

"Pete and Ashlee," Victoria reminds him, and he texts them too.

They beat Doctor Sanders to the hospital, but Victoria gets admitted anyway. A nurse takes them up to the maternity ward and gets Victoria settled into a hospital gown and then a bed.

Doctor Sanders comes in not much later, and looks Victoria over, times a couple of her contractions. "Everything's going great," she says with a smile.

Mom and Dad show up, and Mom smoothes her hair back. "Oh, honey," she says.

Victoria's eyes fill with tears, and she reaches out for Mom's hand. "I'm so glad you're here."

Amber gets there not long after Mom and Dad, and she practically squeals, "Oh my God, V, I can't believe it's finally time."

Victoria laughs and sits up enough for a hug. "Me either." Another contraction hits, and she says, "Oh, fuck."

It goes on for a long time, waves of pain, nurses and Doctor Sanders coming and going, Mom and Gabe holding her hands, Dad and Amber and, later, Diego, behind them just being there with her.

"Okay, Victoria, I need you to push now," Doctor Sanders finally says.

She does, and it's a relief and it hurts like hell and she can hear herself yelling and Gabe looks scared for the first time.

That goes on for a long time too.

"Almost there," Doctor Sanders says. "I need you to push for me again."

And Victoria's at the end of her strength, and she knows she has to be strong for Tyler, but she's not sure she can. "I can't," she says.

"Honey," Mom says, "you can do this."

Victoria squeezes her eyes shut against a rush of tears. "I can't."

"Victoria," Gabe says, and she opens her eyes to look at him. "You are Victoria fucking Asher. You're a Cobra. You can fucking do this." He's been holding her hand, but now he climbs half onto the bed with her, his arm around her shoulders pulling her against his chest. "You can do this," he says fiercely.

Victoria takes in a shaky breath and pushes and pushes and pushes, and she can _feel_ it when it's the last one, when Tyler comes free of her body.

"Do you want someone to cut the cord?" Doctor Sanders asks.

Victoria says, "Gabe," and pushes him away from her just a bit.

"You sure?" he asks with wide eyes.

"Yes." Victoria smiles and laughs and cries, and Gabe cuts the cord, and they do whatever it is they do, and one of the nurses makes her push again for the placenta, and Doctor Sanders puts Tyler in her arms. "Oh," Victoria says. "Oh, hi, baby." She kisses his tiny forehead. "Hi. You're beautiful. I love you."

Everyone crowds around her to see him, and Amber's grinning, and Mom and Dad are too, and Diego and Gabe have their arms around each other.

"Tyler Diego Asher," Victoria says when Doctor Sanders asks for his full name for the birth certificate. She looks up, and both Gabe and Diego are staring at her, Gabe with tears at the corners of his eyes. She smiles, and he pulls out his phone.

"Picture time."

Victoria groans. "No. I probably look terrible."

"You look beautiful," he says. "I'm tweeting this."

She shifts so he can get her and Tyler in the shot.

There are a lot of other pictures too, everyone with her and Tyler, everyone getting their turn at their own picture with Tyler, more pictures of her with Tyler.

Victoria's tired enough to sleep when Tyler does, but she eventually looks at her phone. She has dozens of texts and messages offering their congratulations. She checks her Twitter and sees that Gabe tweeted the photo of her and Tyler with the caption _Tyler Diego Asher. Born 9:37 am Nov 24 2011. Happy Thanksgiving._ Victoria looks happy and tired; Tyler looks perfect. Victoria retweets the picture and caption, texts Alex, Ryland, Nate, and Ashlee back, and turns her phone off again.

*

"You should go home," Victoria tells Gabe late in the evening. Mom and Dad have already headed back to their hotel. "Get some sleep."

"I don't want to leave you alone," Gabe says.

Victoria reaches for his hand and squeezes it. "We'll be okay." She keeps her voice soft so she doesn't wake up Tyler sleeping his crib next to her bed. "You haven't slept at all, and someone has to bring the car seat so we can leave tomorrow. I'm just going to sleep anyway."

Gabe brushes her hair back and leans over to kiss her forehead and then her cheek. "Babe, you're fucking incredible."

After he leaves, Victoria sleeps in bursts of a few hours at a time, interrupted by Tyler's crying.

By the time morning rolls around, she feels pretty confident in her ability to breastfeed and change diapers.

Mom and Dad come in early and take turns cooing over Tyler. Victoria has him back, dozing against her chest, when Gabe comes in with the car seat and a Starbucks cup. His gaze locks onto Tyler.

"I'll trade you baby for coffee," Victoria offers.

Gabe takes one more sip and says, "Done." He puts the coffee on the table next to Victoria's bed, and she carefully shifts Tyler into his arms.

The coffee is seriously good stuff: pumpkin spice latte. Victoria watches Gabe over the rim of it as she drinks.

He holds Tyler like an expert and just looks down at him. His face is so open and so full of love.

She understands, now, what Christine meant about not believing she could love another person so much. Victoria can hardly believe the way she feels about Tyler, and she's pretty sure Gabe is feeling the same thing.

Gabe looks up and grins at her. "Holy shit," he whispers.

"I know," she whispers back.

*

They go home in the afternoon, Gabe, Victoria, and Tyler in one cab and Mom and Dad in another, and Victoria walks Tyler around on a tour of the apartment. Gabe trails behind her and repeats half of what she says in Spanish.

"You're going to be a bilingual baby, huh?" Victoria says.

"Claro que sí," Gabe says over her shoulder.

Victoria smiles and walks Tyler into the nursery. "And this is your room. We painted it just for you. This is where you're going to grow up." She sits down in the rocking chair. "We're going to spend a lot of time in here." She can see why people have rocking chairs. There's something unutterably soothing about rocking with Tyler in her arms.

"Hey," Gabe says from the door.

Victoria looks up, and Gabe's leaning against the doorjamb watching her, a soft smile on his face.

"Want me to keep your parents busy?"

She feels guilty about it - they're only here for a little while - but she doesn't want to move and she doesn't want to let go of Tyler. "Would you?"

"Yeah, babe, of course." He pulls the door most of the way closed behind him and leaves her alone with Tyler.

She rocks and sings and feeds him and changes his diaper.

Gabe comes back later, after she's turned on one of the soft lamps to counteract the darkness outside the window, and pushes the door open wide enough to poke his head in. "There's dinner," he says. "You want to come have something to eat?"

"He's asleep."

Gabe comes all the way into the room. "Want to put him down? We have the baby monitors."

She doesn't, not really, but she's hungry and she doesn't want to wake him up. She stands up and takes Tyler over to his crib.

Gabe comes over to stand with her. He puts his hand on her back. "I can bring you a plate," he offers.

"I can do this." Victoria takes a deep breath. "I'm going to have to anyway, right?" She carefully lowers Tyler down into his crib and pulls the blanket up over his shoulders.

Gabe tugs her close and kisses the top of her head. "Come on, babe. Your mom cooked for us."

Victoria picks up the baby monitor, makes sure it's turned on, and takes it with her out to the dining room where Gabe carefully takes it from her hands and puts it on the shelf behind her.

"You'll hear it," he says.

"Oh, honey," Mom says, "he'll be fine." She hugs Victoria. "I remember when I couldn't bear to be away from you, and now look where you are." She sniffles, and then smiles. "You need to eat something."

Victoria does, although she can feel her whole focus centered on the baby monitor.

"So," Mom says after Victoria settles down a little bit, "we were talking. Think you'd be up for Thanksgiving tomorrow? We still have the turkey and everything."

"Nothing huge," Gabe says. "Us and my dad, and Amber if you want. And you can duck out of it any time you want."

"Sure," Victoria agrees. "I'll call Amber after dinner."

*

Even with a large apartment, only one dog, and not very many people, Thanksgiving turns into more of a production than Victoria can handle. Gabe TiVoed the parade, and he turns it on while he and Mom cook, which makes for a lot of noise.

Victoria escapes to the nursery for a while to watch Tyler sleep. When he wakes up, she nurses and burps him, and then takes him across the hall to her room. She opens up her laptop and turns on the camera.

"Hi, everyone. I guess you know I had a baby a couple of days ago." She turns Tyler toward the camera. "This is Tyler." She smiles down at him, and then holds him close to her chest again. "We just wanted to say thank you to everyone for all of your congratulations and for all of the presents people brought us over the last couple of months. You're the best fans ever, and we're going to be seeing you soon, I promise. We're going back out on tour in a couple of months, and Tyler doesn't change that at all." Victoria ducks closer to the camera and lowers her voice. "We're also hiding. We were a little busy on Thanksgiving, so we're having Thanksgiving today. Right now, Gabe and my mom are in the kitchen arguing about sweet potatoes." She shudders. "We don't want to be in the middle of that." She smiles at the camera again. "We'll just eat whatever they decide to make." She reaches out and turns off the camera.

She watches the video through to make sure it's not a total mess, then uploads it to YouTube. She hums while she does it, and when she realizes she's humming Weezer, she laughs and scrolls through iTunes to find the album.

"You might not remember this," she says to Tyler, "but I played you this before you were born, and your Uncle Ryland and I like to sing along to it. Your Uncle Alex doesn't like that much."

The video finishes uploading, and she tweets the link, then checks her email, singing the whole time. Tyler seems to like it; he stays calm.

Amber comes to collect her later for dinner, and they all settle in around the dining room table - Victoria at one end, Gabe next to her, Diego next to him, Dad at the other end of the table, then Mom and Amber.

"We have to say what we're thankful for before we can eat," Gabe says. "I'll go first. I'm thankful for my band, my friends, and my family, and that includes Tyler."

"I'm thankful for this meal we're about to eat and to be here with at least one of my sons," Diego says.

"I'm thankful for my wife," Dad says, "and our amazing daughter and our grandson."

Mom tears up at that and says only, "Me too." She and Dad are holding hands.

"I'm thankful that I get to have Thanksgiving dinner twice," Amber says, "and that I get to do it with V and her family."

"I'm thankful for Tyler," Victoria says, "and for Gabe." She reaches out for his hand. "This would've been a million times harder without you."

Gabe brings their joined hands up and presses a kiss to her knuckles. "I was never going to leave you to do something like this alone."

*

Mom and Dad go home a few days later, and Victoria didn't notice quite how much they were helping out, because after they're gone, it seems like it takes a lot more work to take care of both herself and Tyler. And, really, it shouldn't be, because Gabe's there sharing in pretty much everything except breastfeeding, which no one was helping her with anyway.

Ryland and Alex come to visit and have their pictures taken with Tyler when they get back. Nate comes up to New York on his way back to L.A. to do the same.

Like things do, everything settles into a routine after a week or so, and then Victoria realizes they're well into December and she hasn't even thought about Christmas gifts.

"I want a Christmas tree," she says over dinner - microwaved soup in front of something mindless on TV while Tyler naps. "And stockings and the whole bit." She looks over at Gabe. "Is that going to be a problem?"

Gabe sits back and considers it. "Guess we didn't think through the interfaith household thing." He tips his head back to stare at the ceiling. "Okay. We're having a menorah too, for Hanukkah."

Victoria puts her soup down on the coffee table and scoots over to hug him.

*

They go out the next day, all three of them bundled up against the cold, and pick out a tree.

"Your first one," Victoria tells Tyler as part of her running commentary. Then she looks at Gabe. "Yours too, I guess."

"I guess." Gabe looks at the trees around them a little dubiously. "What are we looking for?"

"Something that looks good." Victoria looks around. "Maybe something like this?" She wanders toward a tree that's full, but not so full you can't fit ornaments on it. "You're going to have to wrangle it and put it up. How tall are you willing to deal with?"

Gabe hmms and wanders around a couple of trees. "Maybe like this?" He points at a tree about as tall as Victoria.

Victoria walks around the lot, looking at trees that height. "How about this one?" It's about the right height, the right fullness, and looks like a Christmas tree.

Gabe pokes at it and shrugs. "Sure."

Victoria pays for it, and Gabe curses its sap as he carries it home.

Victoria nurses Tyler and changes his diaper, and then they trek down to the basement to get the tree stand and ornaments out of storage. Gabe doesn't let Victoria lift anything.

It takes them most of the afternoon and evening to get the lights untwisted, the ornaments unpacked, and the tree decorated. Victoria makes Gabe set up the playpen so she can put Tyler down near them without Gizmo being able to get to him. It leaves her free to twist around the tree to get things where she wants them.

"Someday," she tells Tyler, "I'll tell you about all of these. And one day we'll go to Grandma and Grandpa's for Christmas, and you can see all the ornaments I made when I was a kid." She stops and smiles. "And someday the ones you make will go on our tree."

"And someday," Gabe adds, "I'm going to teach you how to pack things up neatly so we don't have to spend hours untangling lights."

"It wasn't that long! Besides, now it's time to have hot chocolate and admire the tree." Victoria rocks Tyler, who seems to like the lights. "This is the best part."

Gabe rummages through the cupboards. "We don't actually have any hot chocolate."

Victoria makes a pleading face. "It's not the same without hot chocolate." She turns Tyler toward Gabe and reaches down to pet Gizmo. "The hot chocolate makes the whole experience."

"You," Gabe points at her, "are a menace. I'll be back in a few minutes."

While Gabe's gone, Victoria turns out the lights so it's just the lights of the city outside and the Christmas tree lights inside.

"I can't believe you made me go out in that," Gabe gripes when he comes back. He makes the hot chocolate and brings her a cup. He sits down next to her and tucks an arm around her, cups his hand over Tyler's feet.

Victoria leans her head on his shoulder. "This is the best part."

"It is kind of pretty," Gabe says.

Victoria elbows him in the stomach. "It's beautiful. Tyler's first Christmas tree."

*

They go out to Jersey for latkes with Gabe's dad on the first night of Hanukkah. The next morning, they get up early and take Tyler to Macy's to see Santa. They get their picture taken - Santa holding Tyler, and Gabe and Victoria each perched half on a knee - and buy what Gabe calls "the most expensive pictures we're ever going to have of Tyler."

Mom and Dad fly out again for Christmas, and Mom and Gabe go through the same kind of epic shopping they did for Thanksgiving, with a little more relaxed cooking schedule.

On Christmas Eve, when Victoria's up nursing Tyler, she takes the stocking she's been hiding in her closet and carefully hangs it up next to the ones she and Gabe put up for Tyler and Gizmo. It has Gabe's name in the same script as Tyler's, and even though she's barely left the apartment since Tyler was born and Gabe was with her most of those times, she's managed to collect a bunch of silly little things to fill his stocking with.

When she gets up with Tyler early on Christmas morning and takes him out to see the stockings and the presents under the tree - he won't remember, but she's starting a ritual here - there's a fourth stocking with her name on it hanging with Gabe's, Tyler's, and Gizmo's.

She's still standing there looking at it when Gabe joins her. He stands behind her with his hands on her shoulders and says, "Santa came for you too."

Victoria leans back against him. "Yeah."

Gabe's arms come around her and Tyler and hug them close. It's perfect.

After a moment, Gabe kisses the top of Victoria's head and asks, "So what do you Christians do now?"

Victoria elbows him, carefully because of Tyler. "Stockings," she says. "And breakfast, and then the rest of the presents later when Mom and Dad come over." She glances back at him. "And we have to sit on the floor by the tree for the stockings."

Gabe's eyes are laughing at her, but he says, "Okay," and carefully brings the stockings over to where she's settling onto the floor.

Gizmo yaps at them, so Victoria dumps things out of his stocking first, a collection of toys and a bone and packages of treats. It's more than enough to keep him occupied while Gabe and Victoria go through the other stockings.

Tyler's stocking has a rattle, a hat, some socks Victoria bought on one of their Christmas shopping trips, and a pair of socks she's never seen before. They're striped, and they make a soft noise every time they move.

"One of the baby books said they're good for infants," Gabe says when she holds them up. "They're fascinated with their feet anyway."

"They're adorable." Victoria rattles them at Tyler. "Look at these." Tyler's face scrunches up a little, but he doesn't seem to have an opinion about them. Victoria bends over to kiss his cheek. "We'll try them on later."

She pushes the pile of Tyler's things to one side to make room to unpack her stocking. She gets socks, too, a pair of halfway practical knee-highs with a subtle black-on-black pattern, and a pair of good for stage but not for home sheer purple thigh-highs. She also gets eyeliner, a pair of cheap plastic earrings she knows will look good on stage, and a small box of really expensive chocolate.

"Something you're trying to tell me?"

Gabe knocks his knee into hers. "I know being a mom isn't all you are."

"Thanks." Victoria smiles and nudges him back. "Your turn."

Gabe dives into his stocking with all the gleeful abandon of a small child. Victoria did not get him socks, but she did get him chocolate coins, a few pairs of plastic sunglasses, and a handful of small toys.

"What the hell?" he mutters at some of them.

"Here." Victoria takes one of them, a fish, from him and squeezes it to show him how the eyes pop out of its head.

"That's fucked up!" Gabe gets up and comes back with his phone. "Do that again." He grabs one of the frogs, holds it next to the fish, and snaps a picture. He sends it off, then holds up his phone so she can see his tweet: _We're bugging out!_

Victoria laughs, and Tyler smiles up at her. "That's right, baby." She kisses his forehead.

Gabe's stomach growls loud enough for Victoria to hear, and he rubs at it. "We going out or eating here?"

Victoria wrinkles her nose. "Here. I don't want to get dressed."

Gabe leans over and kisses her forehead. "Pancakes? Waffles? Eggs?"

"Pancakes," Victoria decides, and Gabe gets up to make them.

*

Victoria spends the whole week convincing Gabe he should go out on New Year's Eve. "I'm probably not even going to stay up until midnight, and I can stay home with Tyler," she says. "You've barely been out since I got pregnant. I'm sure you miss it."

She's on the couch with whatever early evening coverage from around the world is on TV when Gabe leaves. He's dressed in a suit with a matching fedora. Victoria wolf-whistles, and he does a catwalk turn in the middle of the living room.

"Looking sharp."

"Thanks." Gabe grins at her. "I wasn't sure I remembered how." He comes over and kisses her cheek.

Victoria reaches up and wraps her arms around his shoulders for a hug. "Happy New Year."

"You too." Gabe steps back and grins at her. "See you next year."

Victoria mostly doesn't mind when he leaves and she's alone. It's not bad, exactly, even if it's not at all how she thought she'd be spending New Year's Eve a year ago. Tyler's here, and sleeping, thank God. She misses going out, though, and she's starting to think she's at the point where if she can get Tyler to take a bottle, she could leave him with someone else and go out for an evening. She hasn't been to a club since the end of the last tour, and by then she was so heavily pregnant it wasn't that fun.

She's depressing herself thinking about it, so she turns off the TV, checks on Tyler, and goes to bed instead. Uninterrupted sleep time is a precious commodity, and she'll take what she can get, even on New Year's Eve.

Tyler wakes her up a little before three, and she stumbles across the hall from her room to his.

"Hi, baby," she says as she lifts him out of his crib. "Happy New Year." She sits in the rocking chair and pulls her pajama top up so he can nurse. This is easy and familiar now, and she closes her eyes as she rocks.

She hears the front door open and close just before Tyler decides he's done. Victoria pulls her pajama top back down and shifts him in her arms so it's more comfortable. Gabe stops at the door and leans in the doorway. He looks like a fashion spread, his hat askew, his tie loosened, his eyes hazy.

"Hi," he whispers, a little loud. Victoria figures he's drunk, but comfortably so, not wasted.

"Hi," she whispers back.

Gabe stays in the doorway, just watching her and Tyler. It doesn't take long for Tyler to fall asleep. Victoria puts him back in his crib. Gabe rolls around the doorjamb into the hallway. Victoria pulls the door mostly shut behind them.

"Happy New Year."

Gabe smiles down at her. "Happy New Year."

Victoria hides a yawn behind her hand. "Did you have fun?"

"Yeah." Gabe's still smiling at her. He cups his hands over her shoulders. "I missed you, though." He leans down and kisses her.

He's kissed her before, but mostly for show. There's no one watching them here, not even Tyler. It's just the two of them in a darkened hallway.

It's been a long time since anyone kissed Victoria. It feels so good she almost wants to cry.

When he stops, her eyes are closed and her hands are on his sides, between his shirt and his coat.

"Happy New Year," Gabe says again.

Victoria huffs out a laugh. "Happy New Year," she says, even though she's thinking, _What the hell was that?_

Gabe lets go of her to go to his own room. "Oh, by the way," he says just before he gets to his door, "I invited Mikey over to see Tyler."

"Okay." Victoria watches him flash a smile, and then close his door. _What the hell was that?_ she thinks again before she forces herself to go back to bed. Tyler will be up again in a couple of hours.

*

Victoria gets up with Tyler early in the morning; Gabe sleeps in.

"How hungover are you?" she asks when he comes out of his room looking for coffee.

"Not very." Gabe sounds surprised. "There might be something to this drinking in moderation thing."

He doesn't say anything about kissing her, and neither does she. They just fall back into their normal routine, and it becomes one of those things where Victoria wonders if it ever really happened. Only sometimes, when she's up with Tyler in the middle of the night, does she think about it, what it was like to have Gabe's lips against hers, Gabe's body warm under her hands.

*

Mikey comes over a couple of days after New Year's, which is fine with Victoria. He also brings Alicia, Gerard, Lyn-Z, and Bandit with him, which she's not quite as okay with. She would have liked a little notice before having a house full of people.

Gabe throws her an apologetic look, and she shrugs back at him. There's nothing to be done about it now. She lets Gabe take Tyler and introduce him to everyone while she goes to the kitchen to get drinks.

She comes back to Mikey holding Tyler. Mikey would not be her first choice for a responsible person to hold a baby, but he's supporting Tyler's head and holding him carefully, and she supposes he had to have held Bandit when she was little.

"He's a baby all right," Mikey says, flat and monotone.

Gabe snorts. "Good to see living in Jersey hasn't ruined your powers of observation."

Mikey flashes Gabe a grin almost too quick to be seen.

Alicia links her arm around Mikey's and leans against his shoulder to look at Tyler, then looks up at Victoria. "He looks like you." She reaches out and brushes her finger against Tyler's chin. "Cute."

"Thanks." Victoria settles into one of the armchairs, and Gabe comes over to sit on the arm of it.

"Wanna see!" Bandit clambers over from her dad's lap into Alicia's and reaches her arms out toward Tyler.

Alicia loops her arm around Bandit's waist to keep her from climbing onto Tyler.

"Bandit," Lyn-Z says, "why don't you give Victoria the present we brought for Tyler?"

It's an effective distraction. Bandit climbs down from the couch and goes over to her mom. Lyn-Z gives her a bag almost as big as she is that Bandit drags over to Victoria.

"Thank you, Bandit," Victoria says.

Bandit's suddenly shy; she scurries back over to her mom. Lyn-Z picks her up and settles her onto her lap.

Victoria pulls the tissue paper out of the bag to get to the present. Presents. There's a baby-sized hoodie with bunny ears, another one that's fuzzy and has bear ears. Below the hoodies are a full Batman costume and one that she's pretty sure is supposed to be a cobra. Gabe takes each thing from her after she looks at it.

Victoria's smiling when she says, "Thank you," after she pulls the last one out of the bag.

"These are awesome." When Victoria looks up, Gabe's grinning at the collective members of the Way family. "I can't wait to put him in the cobra."

*

Victoria's too tired to make a big deal out of her birthday. She takes a seemingly never-ending series of calls wishing her a happy birthday, and she and Gabe have a quiet dinner at home.

A week later, Nate flies out to visit, and they have him, Alex and Lauren, and Ryland and Meredith over for dinner. It's part belated birthday celebration and part band reconnection.

"So," Nate asks when they're lingering at the table over wine and the last bits of cake, "are we going to talk about touring?"

"Here," Lauren says, reaching out, "why don't we take Tyler into the living room and let you all talk."

Gabe kisses Tyler's forehead and stands up to hand him over to her. Alex and Ryland scoot down the table so the five of them are at the same end. While Gabe's up, he gets a folder off of the kitchen counter. "We've been running some numbers." He passes out sheets of paper to each of them.

Victoria looks at him instead of at the piece of paper. She didn't know he was doing that.

"It'll cost us some money, but we can swing two buses." Gabe doesn't look at Victoria as he says it. "The three of you on one bus, the three of us on the other."

"Gabe," Victoria says sharply. He finally looks at her. "No. That's- You don't have to do that. You can be on the party bus. I can handle Tyler."

Gabe turns fully in his chair so his knees press against her thigh. "Babe," he says, completely serious, "I want to do this. I want to be here until you meet a guy you want to be in your life and be Tyler's dad."

The only guy Victoria wants in her life, the only guy she wants to be Tyler's dad, is Gabe. The knowledge slams into her, and it's enough of a shock that she doesn't even argue. "Okay."

Gabe grins, sudden and bright, and ducks in to kiss her cheek. "And we'll be a place of refuge for anyone who desperately needs some quiet time."

"What are you doing with Tyler for shows and soundcheck?" Ryland asks.

Gabe glances at Victoria. "We haven't talked about that yet."

Victoria's arms feel empty without Tyler. "Think we can convince security that watching Tyler is part of their job?"

Gabe smirks. "Or maybe the guys from Sawdust Werewolves. Doesn't one of them have like seven brothers and sisters?"

"I think he's the oldest, too," Alex puts in. They haven't spent a lot of time with Sawdust Werewolves yet, but they seem like good kids, if young.

"If we can do it with tour staff," Victoria says, "I'd rather not hire a nanny." There's something about the idea of a nanny that feels too much like sharing Tyler.

Gabe makes notes on a piece of paper. "I'll see what we can do." He frowns and makes another note. "And get them to do more thorough background checks on anyone who hasn't been out with us before."

Nate and Alex exchange looks across the table, and then they're laughing, and so are Ryland and Victoria, and even Gabe smiles sheepishly.

"Yeah, yeah," he says, "I'm the last person you ever expected to say that." He reaches out and squeezes Victoria's knee. "But I'm not letting anyone who might hurt him get anywhere close to Tyler."

Victoria stops laughing and has to draw in a deep breath to keep from reacting to Gabe's touch any more than that.

*

Victoria doesn't know what to do with this new knowledge, so she doesn't do anything. She shoves it down and focuses on Tyler, on pulling out her keytar and practicing, on being just the same as always. The same as always means curling up with Gabe on the couch in the evenings, waking up over coffee with Gabe in the mornings, and listening to Gabe speak Spanish to Tyler.

Gabe still sings the lullaby, "Papi's gonna buy you a mockingbird."

The first time Victoria says, "You want to go to Papi?" as she hands Tyler to Gabe, Gabe freezes in the act of reaching for him. Victoria resists the urge to explain herself and stubbornly wills herself not to blush.

Gabe takes Tyler after a moment and keeps his eyes on Victoria as he says, "Ven, mijo."

Victoria laughs, later, when she's rocking Tyler. "Maybe Amber was right, huh, baby?" Victoria sure wants her to have been. She wants this to be real, wants them to be like that. She wants Gabe.

She strokes the soft fuzz of Tyler's hair and tells herself to let it go. Gabe's never seen her like that, New Year's Eve kiss not withstanding.

*

Victoria picks a fight with Gabe two days before Valentine's Day. They're working on getting Tyler to take a bottle so they'll be a little more flexible on tour. Gabe tests it against the inside of his wrist, but it's still too hot for Tyler, and he pulls away from it and starts crying.

Victoria snatches Tyler from Gabe and cradles him close. "It's okay, baby. Mommy's got you." She keeps murmuring soothing nonsense as she takes him down the hall to his room. She settles into the rocking chair and opens her shirt. Tyler's crying cuts off as he starts to nurse.

"That's it, baby," Victoria murmurs.

Tyler falls asleep afterwards. Victoria goes out to find Gabe in the kitchen.

"Shit, babe," he says, "I thought it was fine."

"It wasn't." It's just a mistake, part of her knows that. But part of her, the part that wants Gabe to be there forever but knows he won't, isn't willing to let it go. "You hurt him."

"Fuck," Gabe says, "I know. I'm sorry."

Every bit of frustration Victoria's been feeling, about spending the last four months in the apartment with just Gabe and Tyler, about all the ways her life has changed, about everything she can't have, boils over. "No," she hisses. "No. You don't get to be sorry."

Gabe clearly wasn't expecting that. His eyes widen and his mouth opens.

"He's _my_ son," Victoria says before he can speak. "Mine." Her voice gets louder with every word. "I don't need you doing anything with him."

And maybe Gabe is feeling some of the same frustration she is, because his face twists into a scowl. "Like hell you don't!" He shouts back at her. "You'd be crammed into a tiny apartment with no fucking idea what to do if it weren't for me."

"Fuck you! I can do this myself."

"Fine," Gabe says, every line of his body tight and stiff. "Fine. Then see how you like it." He yanks his coat off the hook and slams the front door shut behind him.

Victoria stares after him, breath heaving, for a couple of minutes before she starts to cry.

Gabe doesn't come home that night.

Tyler's fretful all evening and into the next morning.

Victoria lasts until ten-thirty. Then she bundles Tyler up, straps him into his car seat, slings the diaper bag over her shoulder, and calls for a cab. She knows Ryland and Meredith went out of town for Valentine's Day, so she gives the driver Alex and Lauren's address, betting on Gabe staying in the city and not going out to Jersey.

She figures she's right when Alex opens the door in his bathrobe with a serious look on his face and dark circles under his eyes.

"Are you going to yell at him again?"

Victoria swallows past the lump in her throat. "No."

Alex opens the door wide enough for her to come in. "He's in the kitchen. Hungover as all fuck."

Victoria sets Tyler's car seat down on the floor and takes him out of it. This is going to be easier with Tyler in her arms.

Gabe _looks_ hungover as all fuck. He's smiled every other time he's looked at Tyler, but not this time. He has dark circles under his eyes, and he looks older than Victoria's ever seen him look. They stare at each other for what seems like a long time, Victoria in the doorway and Gabe at the table with a cup of coffee clasped between his hands.

"Come home," Victoria finally says.

Gabe shakes his head. "Victoria-"

Victoria wants to cry again. "No," she says, talking over him. "No, Gabe, please." She comes into the room and stands next to Gabe so Tyler's right at his eye level. " _Please_. I do need you. _We_ need you."

Gabe puts his hand on her arm, and that's good, right? That he's touching her?

"Victoria, you can't-" He shakes his head again. "I love Tyler. Yesterday- It broke my heart to hurt him, and then you-"

Victoria blinks back tears. "I know," she whispers. "I'm so- God, Gabe, I'm so sorry."

Gabe leans forward and rests his forehead against her arm where it cradles Tyler.

Victoria puts her other hand on the back of Gabe's head, curving around the shape of his skull. "Please, come home."

Gabe nods against her arm. "Okay," he says. "Okay."

Victoria curls over enough to kiss the top of his head, then carefully shifts Tyler from her arms to Gabe's.

"Ai, mijo," he murmurs as he brings Tyler in toward his chest. He smiles at Tyler, and Tyler smiles and gurgles up at him.

Victoria's hands shake, and she grabs at one of the other chairs so she can sit down.

*

They're careful with each other after that, both of them a little on edge and working hard at it. There are only a couple of weeks until tour, and Victoria leaves Tyler at home with Gabe while she goes to the gym almost every day, both as a practice in leaving him with someone else and as a way to show Gabe how much she trusts him with Tyler.

She's still a little bigger than she was before she got pregnant - and her breasts are definitely bigger - which means she needs a whole new tour wardrobe. Diego comes into the city on a Friday and stays with Tyler while Gabe and Victoria go shopping and get lunch.

Victoria finds it hard to concentrate on clothes. The fourth time she checks her phone to make sure Diego hasn't called, Gabe closes his hand over hers.

"They're going to be fine."

Victoria makes a face at him. "I know. That doesn't mean I like it."

Gabe hugs her close. She looks at their reflections in the mirror and decides to buy the dress she has on. It makes her breasts look amazing, and it looks good next to Gabe.

She buys a new wardrobe in a little under three hours, which is pretty much a record.

"Even I couldn't buy that much in that short a time," Gabe says.

"It's because I shop the same places all the time," Victoria tells him. "They know me, and they know what I like." She looks him up and down. "And my look is a little easier than the layers that go into your hobosexual thing."

Gabe leers back at her. "Aw, baby, you know you want this."

Victoria's breath hitches, because she does, and she laughs to cover it up. "You're buying lunch."


	6. Three Months: March 2012

The last week before tour passes in a flurry of rehearsal, interviews, packing, and last-minute arrangements. They also use it as a test run for relying on other people to watch Tyler. The first day, Victoria makes them stop every time Tyler cries from the other room.

Gabe puts his hands on her shoulders later, at home, and says, "Okay, babe. I let it go today, but we have to let other people take Tyler."

Victoria bites her lip and nods. "I know." She steps forward to lean against Gabe's chest, and he puts his arms around her. "He's my baby."

"If there were a way for us to do this and be with him every second of the day, we would." Gabe rubs soothing circles on her back. "We've gotta do this, though."

Victoria clings to Gabe for a long moment, and then makes herself pull back. "Okay, okay." Her smile feels a little wavery, but it's there. "Tomorrow I will sing and play my keytar and let someone else worry about Tyler."

Gabe looks at her for a moment. "You want to go watch him sleep?"

"Is it lame if I do?"

"Nah." Gabe throws his arm around her shoulders. "I'll come with you."

*

The rest of the week goes better, at least during rehearsal. Tyler seems okay with being around a bunch of different people, but Victoria can barely put him down at breaks, and has to force herself to let Gabe have him.

On Thursday morning, they fly to Miami, and the plane makes Tyler cry so much Victoria ends up in tears too. When they land, Gabe commandeers Nate to help carry all of their stuff while Victoria cuddles Tyler. It puts them all on edge.

Moving onto the bus is at once both familiar and unfamiliar. Familiar because they've been living half their lives on buses for years. Unfamiliar because they're splitting up into two buses and because the baby bus is set up differently from the buses they've had before. Instead of a back lounge, it has a bedroom, with a bed for Victoria and a crib for Tyler.

"Here," Gabe says, reaching for Tyler. "Let me take him while you get settled in."

Victoria doesn't want to let go of Tyler.

Gabe puts one hand on Victoria's back, and tucks the other against Tyler's. "Come on, babe. You're just winding each other up now."

Victoria lets Gabe take Tyler and listens to him walking up and down the bus singing to him while she stows things away and splashes water on her face. All three of them are pretty calm - Gabe even has Tyler smiling - by the time they park at the venue for the night.

"Hey, baby," Victoria says. Tyler waves his arms at her, and she takes him from Gabe. "Papi calm you down? Yeah, yeah." She nuzzles her nose against Tyler's cheek. "You wanna see where we're going to be sleeping?" To Gabe she says, "Your turn to get settled in."

Gabe follows her as far as the bunks and goes about choosing one while she takes Tyler all the way into the back and talks her way through the room. All of the books and websites say describing what you're doing helps with language development.

When she takes Tyler back toward the front of the bus, she finds that Gabe has claimed one of the bunks closest to her door.

*

Tour, even with Tyler, is a rhythm they settle into easily. They move from venue to venue and get into the swing of things. Gabe and Victoria open up the extra bunks on their bus to members of the crew and the other bands who want a relatively quiet place to sleep for a night or two and have a rotating collection of guests.

Between the crew and Sawdust Werewolves' drummer Kyle - who really is the oldest of eight kids and doesn't mind hanging out with a baby - there's always someone to watch Tyler during soundcheck, shows, and the few interviews they do as a whole band. The tight band of panic Victoria feels at leaving Tyler with anyone who isn't Gabe or Diego loosens after the first few shows, although it never goes away.

The other thing that doesn't go away is the way Victoria's heart pounds every time Gabe flirts with her on stage. It's different, now, from how it's been before. She wants him to mean it, and sometimes, when she's flirting back, she lets herself believe he does, just for the length of the show.

Victoria's up with Tyler one morning when they hit a venue, which means Gabe can get some sleep.

He grumbles, "I hate bunks. They're not made for tall people," and he's probably extra tired because the last couple of days have been busy.

"You can take the bed," Victoria offers.

Gabe looks at her pathetically. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah. I'm up with Tyler anyway." She waves him toward the back of the bus. "Stop bothering me and get some sleep."

She does it because Gabe's cranky and they're always in each other's space anyway. She tries not to think about how much she likes the thought of Gabe in her bed.

It becomes a habit, though, Victoria sleeping in the bed at night while they're on the road and Gabe sleeping there during the day when they're parked at venues, and the bed smells like both of them.

Victoria's sleeping in a bed that smells like Gabe, flirting with Gabe on stage every night, and spending her afternoons watching Gabe make up silly songs he sings to Tyler in Spanish.

They hit L.A. with a day off just as Victoria thinks she can't take it anymore. They spend the night at her parents' house - Gabe and Victoria in separate rooms, Tyler in with Victoria - and take Tyler over to Pete and Ashlee's in the afternoon.

Ashlee practically squeals when she opens the door, and she reaches for Tyler. "This is your baby!" She handles Tyler like a pro, and he grabs at her hair. "Oh, sweetie, he's perfect." She turns away when Pete reaches toward Tyler.

"Come on," Pete whines. "I want a turn."

Gabe already has Bronx turned upside down and laughing.

"Let him take him," Victoria says. "They can play with the kids and we can have girl time." Something of her tension must bleed through, because Ashlee gives her a sharp look before putting on a pout and reluctantly handing Tyler over to Pete.

It's warm enough that the boys go outside, and Ashlee and Victoria settle in on the couch.

Victoria doesn't wait for Ashlee to ask before she says, "I'm freaking the fuck out."

Ashlee looks her over for a moment. "Okay," she says. "Why?"

Victoria closes her eyes and says, "I'm in love with Gabe." It's the first time she's said it out loud. She's barely dared to even _think_ it.

She opens her eyes, and Ashlee's looking at her like she's not sure if she should say anything or not. Ashlee finally puts her hand on Victoria's knee.

"Sweetie," she says slowly, "you've been in love with Gabe since before I met you."

She's known Ashlee for almost five years, only a few months less than she's known Gabe.

Victoria laughs a little, but Ashlee doesn't laugh with her.

"Sweetie." There's a twist to Ashlee's mouth.

"Oh." Victoria looks down at Ashlee's hand on her knee. "Really?" she whispers.

Ashlee tugs her forward and hugs her. "Yes, really." She runs her hand over Victoria's hair. "You know, I never thought things were going to last with Jack, even if he wasn't a fucking cheating asshole."

Victoria presses her forehead against Ashlee's shoulder. "I thought I wanted them to." She just breathes for a moment, then says, "I- Do you think- What about him?"

She can feel Ashlee's sigh. "I don't know. He was with Bianca for a long time, and he really loved her."

Victoria wants to cry, but doesn't.

"But, hey," Ashlee says, and her cheer isn't a put-on, "he's living with you, and that's something."

Victoria nods against her shoulder, and pulls back, takes in a deep breath. "Yeah," she says, "that's something." She tries a smile, and doesn't need the sympathetic look on Ashlee's face to tell her it doesn't stick.

"Come on," Ashlee says. "It'll be okay."

Victoria's not sure she believes that - it wasn't okay with Jack - but her smile's a little more real this time, and all the way there when they go outside and Gabe, Pete, Bronx, Tyler, and the dogs are all rolling around in the grass, Gabe keeping a close eye on Tyler so the dogs don't overwhelm or hurt him.

*

On the road northeast to Vegas the next day, while Tyler's sleeping, Gabe asks, "You all right? You seemed a little upset when you were talking to Ash."

Victoria takes advantage, she knows she does, and she curls up next to him on the couch. "I'm okay." She puts her head down on his shoulder. "Tour fatigue, baby fatigue, you know."

Gabe pulls her over more so she's in his lap. Victoria's heart pounds, but she makes herself relax into it. Gabe's arms loop around her waist, and she leans into his warmth. He presses his lips into her shoulder.

"Sucks," he offers.

Victoria laughs and twists to look at him. "That's it? 'Sucks'?"

Gabe runs a thumb over the curve of her cheek. "Made you laugh."

Victoria can feel the line Gabe touched as clearly as if it had been marked. She shoves at his shoulder. "You suck."

Gabe pulls her close again. "There's nothing we can do about tour fatigue, and you know you can ask for whatever you need with Tyler. Pretty much it just sucks."

"Yeah, you're so much help." He is, though, with the way he lets her stay cuddled on his lap until Tyler's crying comes across the baby monitor.

*

A couple of days later, in Seattle, Gabe takes Tyler from her and says, "You have an appointment."

There's nothing on Victoria's calendar. "I do?"

"You do." Gabe grins at her. "At a spa. It comes highly recommended. Think of it as a present from Tyler and me for putting up with both of us on one bus." He hands her her purse and pushes her toward the front of the bus. "Your ride's waiting."

Victoria hasn't been to a spa in way too long, and this is a nice one. She's a few minutes early, so they usher her into a waiting room with comfortable chairs and a soothing fountain, and someone brings her a cup of herbal tea to drink while she waits.

Gabe's present consists of a mani-pedi and a massage. Victoria leaves the spa feeling like she's floating more than walking.

When she gets back, the front of the bus is empty, so she heads toward the back and runs into Gabe in the hallway between the bunks.

"You look happy," he says with a smile.

Victoria's smile comes easier than it has in weeks. "I am. That was amazing." She reaches up and puts her arms around him. "Thank you."

Gabe's arms settle comfortably around her, his hands resting at the small of her back. "You're welcome."

He's still smiling at her, and she's so loose and happy, and she pushes up onto her toes and kisses him.

He kisses back.

He kisses back, and she slides her arms up to hook around the back of his neck, and his mouth fits perfectly against hers, and she would do this forever if she could.

Tyler's crying echoes through the bedroom door and from the baby monitor clipped to Gabe's hip.

They stop kissing, and Gabe rests his forehead against hers.

"He's the only person I would stop doing this for," he says low into her ear. His hands slide slowly across her waist and away, and he goes in to get Tyler.

*

It's not awkward. It just feels like someone hit the pause button on the good part of a movie so they could do what needed to be done elsewhere without losing the mood.

Gabe's smiles are a little softer, and Victoria holds onto that floaty feeling. They play with Tyler, then there's soundcheck, a radio interview Gabe and Ryland go to do while Victoria stays with Tyler, Tyler's bedtime, and the show. After the show, Nate and half of Sawdust Werewolves climb onto Gabe and Victoria's bus, all needing a break from their usual sleeping quarters.

Gabe and Victoria don't get a moment alone, but there's a promise in his eyes when he says goodnight that keeps her from worrying and lets her go to sleep.

The next night, in Boise, Gabe tangles their fingers together for a moment as they walk from the dressing room to the stage.

The day after that, when they pull into Salt Lake City and Gabe passes Victoria as he goes back to sleep for a while, he runs his hand across the line of her jaw and murmurs, "Hotel tonight."

She should not be so turned on while holding Tyler.

The warm flush of arousal stays with her through the familiar ritual of hotel days - moving Tyler's crib and everything else they need for a baby overnight into the hotel between soundcheck and the show, getting someone to stay with Tyler during the show - and into the show itself, where she channels it into the music and tries not to moan when Gabe wraps himself around her to sing.

Jesse, one of the crew who misses his own kid while he's on tour and volunteered to take Tyler for the evening, tells them he won't mind if they don't get back until late, so they hang out after the show, signing, taking pictures, and meeting fans. The fans filter out eventually, and they head back to the hotel.

"Tyler was good," Jesse reports. "A little fussy, but he always is when he's not with one of you."

"Thanks, man," Gabe says. He and Jesse do the secret handshake Gabe made up four states ago for the people who spend time with Tyler. Victoria just laughs at them.

They've been getting adjoining rooms or two-room suites whenever possible, giving each of them space but also leaving them both within range to get up with Tyler no matter which room they put him in. They have a suite tonight, which makes it easy, once they've checked on Tyler, for Gabe to grab up the baby monitor and pull Victoria into the other bedroom.

He puts the baby monitor on one of the bedside tables, and then comes back to Victoria. He puts his hands on her shoulders, and then slides them down to link with her hands.

"Where were we?" he asks, like it's been only moments and not two days.

"Here, I think." Victoria lets go of his hands to put her arms around his neck. She's wearing heels tonight, so it's not as much of a stretch to kiss him as it was before. He still bends to meet her, and he slides his arms around her waist.

Victoria opens her mouth to him, and they kiss deeper, wetter. There's an urgency to it, but it's comfortable, not frantic. Victoria's glad she's started wearing dresses with wider, looser skirts, because it gives her enough room to hike one leg up over Gabe's hip without tearing a seam.

It brings her flush against him. He's hard, his cock pressing against her, and she gasps, murmurs his name into his mouth, shudders with arousal.

"Yeah?" he asks, his voice rumbling in his chest.

"Yeah," she answers back.

She reaches to push his flannel off at the same time he reaches for the zipper on her dress. He pulls the zipper all the way down, then lets go so she can push his flannel off. She tugs his t-shirt up until he gets the hint and takes it off himself while she slips her arms out of the straps of her dress, slides it down her body, and steps out of it. Gabe's tossing his clothes to the side - Victoria takes a moment to appreciate that he's eager enough he's not taking time to carefully fold anything - so she tosses her dress onto the growing pile of cloth.

Gabe has his hand on his belt, but he stops and looks at her. "Babe," he says, sounding strangled. He shakes his head, and traces the line of her bra across the top of her breasts. "You-"

Victoria knows how he feels. She's seen the sharp lines of his abs, but never like this. Never when she can touch them all she wants, never when he's pulling her in against them. Their skin touches, and it's like an electric shock to her system. Their kisses are frantic now. Gabe's hands cup her ass, and if she could get the right angle, she could come from this, from rubbing up against each other like a couple of teenagers.

She wants more than that.

She reaches between them, arches her stomach away from him, and fumbles at Gabe's belt. "Get your fucking pants off," she growls at him, when the way his hands are gripping her proves too much distraction for her to concentrate on even the minimal complexity of unbuttoning his pants.

"Fuck." Gabe steps back. "Fuck, babe."

Victoria waits until he's pushing his jeans down his legs before she reaches behind herself and unhooks her bra.

Gabe almost trips on his pants coming back to her. "You've always had the most amazing breasts." He cups them in his hands and presses his lips against the curve of one of them.

Before, she would have loved it. Right now it's a little too much. She takes his hands in hers and pulls them up to her lips.

"Hey," she says, pressing a kiss to the back of his fingers, "not that." She wrinkles her nose. "Too much."

Gabe strokes her cheek. "Okay. Something else then." He kneels in front of her.

Victoria sucks in a breath, and then another one when Gabe kisses her stomach. She threads her hands into his hair, letting the curls tangle around her fingers. Gabe rubs into it, then turns his attention to unbuckling her shoes.

Victoria balances with one hand on his shoulder as he gently pulls first one then the other of her shoes off. He strokes his hands all the way up her legs, and she's sorry they're on the outside, but then he hooks his fingers in the waistband of her panties and draws them down her legs. There's a mischievous twist to his mouth as he slides his hands up the inside of legs, pushing at her thighs to make her step farther apart.

The anticipation is almost too much, and then he leans in and licks across her clit.

Victoria shudders, steps away from him, and her voice is almost unrecognizably low even to her own ears when she says, "Get your underwear off and come to bed."

She turns her back on him, and pushes the comforter and blankets to the side so she can stretch out on the sheets of the bed. Her eyes dip down to his cock, and then back up to his eyes. She holds her gaze there as she poses, arranging herself into a sultry, inviting curve. Gabe breaks the eye contact to sweep his gaze over her body.

"I don't know how I got so fucking lucky," he says as he comes to join her.

"You haven't yet." Victoria rolls onto her back, pulling Gabe with her. He's heavy on top of her in just the right way.

Gabe smoothes her hair away from her face, kisses her again. They kiss for long minutes, the two of them arching into each other, hands moving across skin.

"Tell me what you want," Gabe says between kisses.

They can barely stop kissing long enough for Victoria to answer, so she resorts to shoving him back by his shoulders. "I want you to get a condom and fuck me."

Gabe groans and presses his forehead against her shoulder. "If I fuck you, it's going to be over really fucking fast."

Victoria pulls his head up, hands on either side of his face. "I haven't had sex in over a year. You don't have to be good, you just have to be there."

Gabe snorts. "Well, you're the queen of sweet talk."

"Baby," Victoria purrs into his ear, "if you don't get a condom, I'm going to make myself come, and then you won't get to fuck me at all."

Gabe pulls away grinning. "You would never give this up." He does a spokesmodel gesture down his body. He also gets up and gets a condom out of the outside pocket of his suitcase.

"Keeping them handy?" Victoria teases.

Gabe unrolls the condom onto his cock. "I knew you wouldn't be the kind of girl who likes to be kept waiting."

"That's right." Victoria spreads her legs, tilts her hips up, opens her arms to him.

"Fuck, babe," Gabe swears as he pushes into her.

"Fuck," she echoes. It feels so good to have something other than her own hand. It feels so good to have _Gabe_. "Fuck, Gabe. Fuck, come on."

"I'm trying," he grits out, "not to come right this fucking second."

"You can do that later." It's the first time either of them has said anything about this happening again. Victoria pushes her hips up against him, but she can't get enough leverage to get them moving the way she wants. "Just fuck me."

"You-" Gabe doesn't finish the thought, but he does start to move. His first few thrusts are light, even things. Victoria wants that with him - wants everything with him - but she doesn't have the patience for it now. She wraps her leg around him and digs her heel into his ass.

"Come on," she growls.

Gabe picks up the pace, and it's not light or even anymore. Victoria rocks up against him, yanks his head down to kiss him, and it's barely any time at all before they're not even really kissing anymore, just breathing into each other's mouths.

Gabe pulls his hips back, gets his hand between them, and his thrusts press it against her clit.

"Gabe," Victoria says on a gasp.

"Victoria," he growls back.

She can feel her orgasm building, cresting, washing through her. She almost doesn't want to come, doesn't want this to stop, but it's so good there's nothing she can do about it. She comes with an almost silent, "Oh," and Gabe snaps his hips into her hard.

"Come on, baby," Victoria murmurs. She runs her hands through Gabe's hair. "Come on."

Gabe seals his mouth to hers as he comes. They keep kissing for long moments afterwards, their hands stroking restless paths across each other's bodies.

Gabe sighs and pulls away to deal with the condom, then flops down on his back next to Victoria.

"Holy fuck," he says, still panting. "That rocked my fucking world, and you didn't even suck my dick."

Victoria clumsily pats his arm. "When you get it up again, I will."

His fingers twitch against her hip. "I'll do you too."

"Okay." Victoria waits for her heart to slow down and her breathing to even out. After a couple of minutes, she turns on her side and snuggles up to Gabe. "You cuddle, right?"

"Hell yes I cuddle." Gabe grabs at the covers and turns on his side to face her. It's awkward for a moment, but then he shifts, and she wriggles, and they fit together, her leg between his, his arms around her, her head on his shoulder.

*

Victoria wakes up not much later when Tyler's crying comes across the baby monitor. "I'll go," she says when Gabe wakes up too. She scoops her panties and Gabe's flannel off the floor and puts them on.

"Hey, baby," she says to Tyler. She lifts him out of his crib. "Are you hungry? That's it, isn't it?" She sits down in the chair and twitches the flannel out of the way so Tyler can nurse.

When she gets up to put him back in his crib, Gabe is leaning in the doorway watching her. Victoria pulls Tyler's blanket up over him and joins Gabe at the door. Gabe slides his hands around her sides under the flannel.

"You're so beautiful." Gabe kisses her so sweetly, it almost makes her cry.

She jokes with him instead. "Breastfeeding turns you on?"

Gabe grins. "Everything you do turns me on." He pulls her toward him. "Come back to bed."

*

Between the commitments of tour and the commitments of taking care of an infant, they don't actually have sex that often after the first night. Instead there are kisses goodnight and sharing the bed for afternoon naps and more touching than before. It's good. Hell, it's _fun_ , in a way Victoria had almost forgotten relationships could be.

She wonders if this is just a tour fling or if she'll still get to have Gabe when they go back home, but she's afraid to talk to Gabe about it. She likes the way it feels real when he tells the audience, "Give it up for my girl Victoria," and she doesn't want to lose that.

On an afternoon when Tyler's napping and Gabe's doing press and guaranteed to be gone for at least an hour, Victoria calls Amber.

"Let me talk to Gizmo."

Amber sighs dramatically. "You only call me when you want to talk to your dog. What kind of friend are you?"

"I want to talk to you," Victoria assures her, "but if I do that first, I'll forget about Gizmo, so put him on so I can tell you what's going on."

"Fine, fine." Amber puts the phone on speaker. "Gizmo, it's your mommy."

"Hi, baby," Victoria says. Gizmo barks in answer. "We miss you so much. Tyler's getting big. He's bigger than you now. Have you been good for Amber?"

"He's been really good," Amber croons. "I think he likes being an only child."

Victoria laughs. "Good boy. We'll be home in just a couple of weeks." Victoria makes a loud kiss noise into the phone. "Okay, you can take Gizmo off now."

There's a click as Amber takes her phone off speaker. "Okay," she says, "what's going to make you forget about Gizmo?"

Victoria spills everything, from the moment she realized she wanted Gabe up through last night when Gabe laid in bed with her until she fell asleep even though he couldn't sleep on a moving bus. "And I don't know if this is just sex or if it's something real."

"V, he's practically raising your kid. That's pretty damn real."

"But that's just Gabe. He loves kids."

"He loves _your_ kid. Do you really think he's the kind of guy to sleep with you just for increased access to Tyler?"

Put that way, it sounds ridiculous. Victoria giggles. "I guess not."

"You two were practically married without the sex before. Now you're practically married with the sex too."

"Yeah, I guess."

Amber sighs. "Or, and this is a totally crazy idea, you could talk to Gabe about it."

"He could break my heart," Victoria admits. "Way worse than Jack did."

"He could do that anyway," Amber points out. "At least you'd know and you could stop torturing yourself about it."

*

In Chicago, Christine brings Genevieve to soundcheck. Christine lets Genevieve go as soon as they're done, and she hurls herself across the stage toward Gabe. She kisses his cheek and then does it again.

"Daddy's in Cin'natti, and he said to kiss you for him."

Gabe kisses her cheek again. "Now you can give him a kiss from me too." He gives Christine a one-armed hug, and then leads them on a procession back to the bus.

Christine walks with Victoria. "How're you doing?"

"Good. Gabe helps a lot, and we've got a lot of support."

Christine shakes her head. "I can't imagine taking Genevieve on tour."

Victoria shrugs. "The worst is having to let someone else watch Tyler while we're busy, but we're managing." She follows Christine into the bus. "And I can't imagine us doing it without a separate bus."

Kyle has Tyler on a blanket on the floor. Tyler burbles at Victoria, and she bends down to pick him up. "Hi, baby." She kisses his cheek. "Come meet Christine."

"Can I?" Christine asks, holding out her arms.

Victoria hands Tyler to her, and Christine sits down on the couch with him.

"That's your baby?" Genevieve asks, staring hard at Victoria.

Victoria crouches down to Genevieve's level. "It is. His name's Tyler."

Genevieve peers at Tyler. "He's really little."

Christine smiles at her. "You were this little too."

Genevieve pouts. "Wasn't."

"You were." Gabe scoops her up again and sits next to Christine. "I remember it."

Being on Gabe's lap puts Genevieve just high enough for her to look down at Tyler. She looks at him as suspiciously as a four-year-old can.

Gabe exchanges an amused look with Christine and says, "He'll hold your hand." He takes Genevieve's hand in his and stretches it out to Tyler. Tyler grabs onto two of her fingers.

"He's strong!"

"He is," Gabe says. "You were too." He puts his cheek against Genevieve's. "You used to grab onto my sunglasses and not let go."

"You'd have a million of them if you could," Christine says fondly.

"Not a million," Gabe says without looking away from Tyler and Genevieve, "but maybe two or three." Then he looks up and smiles at Victoria.

She thinks maybe, maybe this is as real for him as it is for her.

*

One afternoon, in Michigan, Gabe and Victoria get to the dressing room before anyone else. Victoria leans against the wall. Gabe looms over her, one forearm on the wall by her head and flirtatious smile on his lips.

"You think you can have me?" Victoria teases.

"I know I can have you." Gabe leans closer. "If we had time, I'd have you right now."

Victoria reaches up to put her arms around his shoulders. "Would you?"

"I would." Gabe closes the last few inches of space between them and kisses her.

Of course, that's when the door opens and the rest of their band comes tumbling in.

"Oh-ho!" Alex says. "So that's what's going on on the other bus?"

"Delicious," Ryland drawls.

"Does this mean I'm not your favorite anymore?" Nate asks.

"Fuck you," Gabe says. "You were never my favorite."

Victoria hides her laughter in Gabe's shoulder.

*

Two days later, in a dressing room in Pittsburgh, Alex reads part of a fan's review of the show out loud, smirk firmly planted on his face.

"Motherhood," it says, "clearly agrees with Vicky-T. She's more animated and dynamic on stage than I've ever seen her. Her by-play with Gabe is amazing this tour, and she's just lighting up her side of the stage. I have no idea how she's keeping it up while taking care of a five-month-old baby. The rumor is that she doesn't even have a nanny. I mean, she's practically glowing. I haven't heard any rumors about it, but I wouldn't be surprised if she's getting laid."

Victoria flips him off.

"Oh, if only they knew." Ryland's smirk matches Alex's.

Gabe bends down and kisses Victoria's neck. "Ignore them, babe. They're just jealous you got to me first."

"Fuck that," Nate says. "I'm the original resident of your basement."

*

They're scheduled for a day off at home in New York. Victoria bites the bullet the day before, in Buffalo.

She sits down next to Gabe in the front lounge and asks, "Are we going back to separate bedrooms tomorrow?"

Gabe sounds as uncertain as she feels when he asks, "Do you want to?"

Victoria shakes her head. "No, but we haven't really talked about this."

"We haven't," he agrees. "We seem to be doing okay."

Victoria looks down at her hands. "Yeah, we are."

Gabe takes one of her hands in his. "I'm not planning on going anywhere, okay?"

Victoria nods. It's not everything, but it'll be enough. "Okay."

Gabe leans his shoulder against hers. "In fact, the only plan I have involves you, me, and a bed in our apartment."

Victoria can feel the corners of her mouth turn up into a smile. "Really?"

Gabe nuzzles against her cheek. "I'd tell you more, but Tyler's in the room."

Victoria holds him there with her free hand against the back of his head. "I guess it'll be a surprise then."

*

Victoria knows she's lost some weight on tour - she had to find a seamstress to take in a couple of her dresses - so when they're home, after they put Tyler to bed, she sends Gabe back to his room to wait for her while she changes.

"Just give me a couple of minutes," she says. "I promise you'll like it."

Gabe presses a kiss to her lips. "Don't take too long, or I'll start without you."

Victoria has a lot of practice with quick changes involving complicated clothes, so it takes her only a couple of minutes to put on a black garter belt with its matching negligee and stockings - she doesn't bother with the panties - then step into a pair of black heels and put on her reddest lipstick.

She's wet and her gaze, when she checks in the mirror, is already soft and heavy-lidded.

Gabe left the door to his room open, so she can see him lying in bed with a hand on his cock. She can also see when he notices her coming toward him, because he stops, sits up, and stares at her. She pauses in the doorway, hips to one side, one leg bent, hands high up on either side of the doorway.

"You're ruining all my plans," Gabe complains. "I was going to go slow and make this really good for you."

Victoria turns around to close the door, letting him look at the view from the back. "What makes you think it won't be good this way?" She lets her hips sway as she walks to the bed, then steps out of the heels and straddles Gabe.

"I'm sure it'll be good for me." Gabe runs his hands over her stockings and up to her ass.

"It's going to be good for both of us." Victoria bends over to kiss him. She has her hair down so it makes a soft curtain around them. "It's going to be so good." She takes one of his hands and moves it from her ass to her cunt.

He takes the hint and strokes his fingers across her. It's light, teasing. Victoria presses down against the next press, and his touch firms against her. He dips one finger into her, rubs, comes back to her clit. His eyes aren't on his hands or her breasts; he's looking at her face.

Victoria can feel herself getting wetter and clenching against him. "Condom?"

Gabe reaches for it with the hand that's not against her cunt. Victoria takes it from him, tears it open, and unrolls it over his cock. She pulls his hand away so she can slide down onto him.

He puts his fingers in his mouth and sucks enough to hollow his cheeks.

Victoria rolls her hips against him. "I don't know what makes you think I can wait for you to be slow anyway."

Gabe pulls his fingers out of his mouth and laughs. "One of these days," he says, half promise, half threat, "we're going to fuck for hours." He rubs his fingers along her cunt, around where his cock is stretching her open, and up to press against her clit.

Victoria rolls her hips again. "You'll have to get me off at least once before you can do that." She bends over him, changing the angle and pressing her clit harder against his hand. "Fuck, this is good."

Gabe puts his free arm around her shoulders, holding her close, and toys with the strap of her negligee. "I can't believe you put this on for me." He kisses her hard, moves his hand against her clit in counterpoint to her hips.

Victoria's thighs are starting to shake, both with the effort of moving and with how close she is to coming.

"You're just-" Gabe keeps kissing her over and over again. "I can't believe I get to have you like this."

Victoria's so in love with him. She kisses him hard and sucks at his neck to keep from saying it out loud.

Gabe arches up into her mouth, her hips. "Babe," he groans. He comes before she does, and when she growls at him a little, he keeps moving his hand until he gets her there too. He keeps moving even after that, his touches sending aftershocks tingling through her.

When it stops being good and starts being too much, she pulls away, holding onto the condom, and then slipping it off, tying it, and tossing it into the trash can next to the bed. She lies back down on top of Gabe, breathing in his scent while he traces over the lacy edges of her negligee and stockings.

"You know you don't have to do this," he says. He tugs at the top of one of her stockings. "Not that I don't appreciate it, but you don't have to do this for me."

Victoria presses a kiss to his chest. "When we were packing to move, Amber was jealous of my lingerie collection and made me take her shopping. I started bawling in the middle of the store because I didn't think I would have anyone to wear it for again."

Gabe's silent for so long that Victoria pushes herself up to look at him.

"I'm just trying to get over the fact that you have a whole collection of this." Gabe cards his fingers through her hair. "I can see what you mean about never being able to wait to do it slow." He pulls her down and kisses her slow, wet, deep. "But I'd still want you even if you were just hanging around in sweats."

Victoria's heart feels like it might burst with how much she loves him.

*

They're lying in bed, post-coital, in a hotel in Virginia, Tyler asleep in the other room, Gabe idly playing with her hair.

"Can I tell you something," Gabe asks, "without you freaking out?"

Victoria turns on her side to face him. "Is it something that's going to make me freak out?" The thing she's most afraid he'll say is that this is over, but he hasn't stopped touching her, so if it's that, he's more of an asshole than she ever would have guessed.

Gabe traces her eyebrows, her cheekbones, the line of her nose. "I hope not."

Victoria tucks her hands under her cheek. "Okay, tell me."

Gabe leans in close to whisper in her ear. "I don't want you to ever find another guy to be in your life."

All of the air goes out of Victoria's lungs. "Oh." She struggles against the tears prickling at the corners of her eyes. "Gabe," she breathes.

"Hey," he says, wiping at her eyes with his thumbs. "Hey, babe, Victoria, don't cry."

Victoria grabs at his hand and presses it to her lips. "I love you," she says against his skin. "I don't want anyone else raising Tyler."

Gabe's eyes look suspiciously bright too, and then he puts his arms around her and kisses her and says, "Me too."

*

In the dressing room in Atlanta, before their last show of the tour, Gabe plays with Victoria's fingers, twining them with his own, letting go, just touching her.

Nate throws a drumstick in their direction. It goes wide enough that he wasn't really aiming for them. "You two are sickening. Thank God we don't have to watch this much longer."

Victoria cuddles into Gabe as obnoxiously as possible. "Is somebody jealous? You know, just because we love each other doesn't mean we don't love you anymore."

"Yeah," Gabe says. "You'll always be our bitch."

Nate throws his other drumstick their way.

"Look on the bright side," Alex says. "You're going to be all the way across the country from them. We have to be in the same city."

"I wonder how Meredith would feel about moving to California," Ryland muses.

"Ivy League could be a bicoastal band," Alex says.

"We'd be just as famous and play even fewer gigs."

"Fuck you. You're all dicks," Victoria says through her giggles. She kisses Gabe's cheek, then pulls herself up off the couch. She gives Nate his drumsticks back and goes to stand in front of the mirror for a wholly unnecessary check of her makeup.

*

Their first day home is a whirlwind of chaos. Amber brings Gizmo over, and he yips and runs around Victoria's feet while she tries to get Tyler's things sorted out and back to where they belong in the nursery. Gabe unpacks their bags and starts doing laundry. Tyler's fretful at first, but calms down when Victoria sings to him while rocking them in the rocking chair.

Victoria thinks she's going to get to relax when Tyler goes down for his nap, but Gabe says, "You're going to move into the master bedroom with me, right?"

Victoria leans against him. "Yes. Are you going to make me organize my shoes by color?"

Gabe kisses her temple. "Of course not. They should be organized by how often you wear them."

Victoria shoves at him. "You're going to help."

"Does that mean I get to see your lingerie collection now?"

Victoria laughs. "No. That you get to see bit by bit. But you can see all the rest of my clothes." She pulls him down the hall, and they spend Tyler's naptime moving her clothes, shoes, jewelry, and other assorted personal items from her room to the master bedroom.

Because they spend all afternoon doing chores, Victoria insists on making it an early night. She curls up in bed with Gizmo while Gabe puts Tyler down.

"I think he's just as tired as you are," Gabe says. "He fell right to sleep." He bends over to kiss her, and then takes Gizmo and puts him out into the hallway before he closes the door.

"It's been a long day." Victoria watches Gabe line his shoes up neatly in the closet and carefully put his clothes in the hamper as he takes them off.

"It has." Gabe ducks into the bathroom to brush his teeth. He comes back and turns off the overhead light, leaving only one of the bedside lamps on. "Tyler did pretty well, though, for all that."

"I think being on tour probably got him used to chaos."

"Probably," Gabe agrees. He pulls back the covers and gets into bed with her. "You ever consider having another one?"

Victoria reaches for him. "Come convince me."


	7. Epilogue: February 2013

> **No, I didn't get arrested**  
>  But that is me, my girl, and our kid at the courthouse. Yeah, I said our kid. The judge signed the papers, and I'm now legally responsible for him until he's 18. Please don't teach him to do things that will make the cops call me. He has his Uncle Nate for that.
> 
> That's only half our good news. I managed to convince Victoria that Tyler shouldn't be an only child. His little brother or sister is due in September. This isn't going to change our plans for tour! We've done this before, and this baby's going to be born between tours just like Tyler.
> 
> I'm still trying to convince Victoria to convert to Judaism. If you see us on tour, help a boy out.

Victoria scrolls through the comments on Gabe's blog post. There are a few of the "you could do better than Victoria" variety, but most of them are congratulations and speculation about how good-looking their kid is going to be.

Tyler's laughter comes closer, and he runs through the door into the office with one of Gizmo's toys in his hand and Gizmo following along behind him.

Victoria scoops him up as he gets near. "Are you taking Gizmo's toys?"

"We're playing!" Tyler waves the squeaky toy, and Gizmo jumps up toward it.

"Mommy está trabajando," Gabe says from the doorway. "Déjale en paz."

"It's okay," Victoria says. "Throwing toys is an outside activity," she adds to Tyler as he raises his arm to no doubt hurl Gizmo's toy across the room.

Tyler puts his arm down. "Park?"

Gabe comes into the room and leans over, one hand on the back of Victoria's chair, and the other on Tyler's shoulder, to kiss her. "Up to you," he murmurs.

It's been raining off and on all week, but it's cleared up a little, with the sun bursting through the clouds every once in a while.

"Sure." Victoria kisses Tyler's forehead and takes Gizmo's squeaky toy from him. "You go with Papi to get your coat on and I'll get Gizmo's leash." She hands him to Gabe and closes her laptop.

Gabe's being ridiculously overprotective already, so he hovers while she stands.

"I'm not as tired with this one," she says.

Gabe touches her cheek. "I worry." He brushes a kiss to her lips.

"Love you," she says against his mouth.

"Te quiero," he answers back.

Tyler echoes both of them in a chant of "Love you, te quiero, love you."

Gabe laughs and bounces him a little. "Vámanos, mijo. ¡Al parque!"

"¡Al parque!" Tyler crows.

Victoria whistles for Gizmo and follows them down the hall.


End file.
